SELF PROTECTION : PREPARING YOURSELF FOR SURPRISE : Women With Guns : Fear of Firearms Can Be Overridden by the Fear of an Assailant

Be not afraid of any man.

Not matter what his size;

When danger threatens, call on me

And I will equalize.

--19th-Century motto, Winchester Rifle Co.

Mary Ann Escandon steps up to the starting line, her three-inch heels sinking into sandy desert soil, a purse slung jauntily over one shoulder, eyes invisible behind black-tinted sunglasses.

She considers the enemies before her: targets painted to resemble such would-be attackers as a burly, middle-aged white man, a skinhead with a Mohawk and a swastika tattoo, and a bare-chested black man.

At the signal, she reaches into a secret compartment of the purse and pulls out a snub-nosed, .38-caliber revolver. The five-foot, 100-pound Escandon rushes toward the targets, a flash of fire exploding from the revolver muzzle with each pull of the trigger.

The bullets sing as they pierce the targets, the sound echoing through the desert valleys of San Bernardino National Forest, as Escandon strikes the last of the assailants square in the chest. “All shots are good,” an instructor announces, and Escandon returns to a car where she packs the revolver and ammunition in a shiny black Lancome makeup bag with a zipper top.

Ten years ago, Escandon described herself as “totally anti-handgun.” But with all the crime these days--the FBI reports that a forcible rape occurs every six minutes in this country--Escandon says she must learn to defend herself in ways she never imagined.

For instance, she recently found herself spending a chilly Saturday in a remote public shooting area, participating in a firearms class for women that rehearses real-life scenarios, such as having to draw from a purse while wearing high heels. Another scenario involves rolling out of bed and using both a pistol and a shotgun to mow down intruders.

The rehearsals make Escandon feel more comfortable about using the revolver she keeps in a drawer of her nightstand.

“I feel so much safer,” said Escandon, a Costa Mesa resident whose husband is often away on business trips. “I feel secure knowing that I have it. I pray I never have to use it.”

Mace, stun-guns, personal alarms, martial-arts training, pistols, even shotguns--these are some of the self-defense tactics that women are turning to because they don’t feel safe anymore, according to Cathy Tolley, who organized the firearms class for women.

Tolley, a registered nurse, is a firearms instructor certified by the National Rifle Assn. She has informally conducted several classes for women in the last year, recruiting participants from the standard firearms courses she and her boyfriend teach.

The one-day class for women included a morning of firearms training in the living room of Tolley’s Anaheim home and an afternoon of shooting in the desert. Tolley said she designed the all-female shooting class because for many women, learning to handle firearms “is like going into the men’s locker room.”

The class also incorporated other self-defense strategies, including the proper response to wolf whistles (“I would appreciate it if you would keep your comments to yourself”) and how to elude intruders in your own home (“Look for places to hide, or where your opponent might hide”).

But even Tolley, who has eight years of martial-arts training and arms strong enough to pump a shotgun effortlessly, says the only way she could overpower a male attacker would be with a firearm.

“A firearm is the ultimate equalizer,” Tolley told the class. “No matter how big the man is, how many drugs he’s on, you’ll be able to defend yourself. I believe if all those men knew we were . . . carrying a pistol in our purses, they’d think twice about attacking.”

None of the seven women in the class have had to use a gun against an attacker. In fact, none said she had turned to firearms training as a result of being assaulted. Rather, they perceive through news reports that women are increasingly on the receiving end of violent crimes and that those who assault women spend little, if any, time in jail.

“No place is safe,” said Deborah Benjamin of Anaheim, who keeps a .357-caliber pistol in her bedroom. “There’s wackos everywhere you go. Those creeps know they can get away with it.”

One of Escandon’s friends was recently assaulted in the parking lot of a department store by a crowbar-wielding robber. “A crowbar,” she said. “Can you believe it?”

Amy Clover, a 19-year-old Fullerton College student, said she resents the way men often size her up.

“I worry not about date rape but about rape, period,” Clover said. “The way some people look at me . . . I can tell what they’re thinking. I know what’s on their minds.”

Until September, Clover said she had never fired a gun. It was the controversy surrounding the state Legislature’s ban on assault rifles that motivated her to seek firearms training.

“I’ve always been paranoid of guns, but once I went to a class it was fun,” Clover said. “I don’t have a gun and I don’t plan on getting one right now. I just wanted to know how to use one.”

Lori Jones had done a little shooting with her father and brothers when she was a child, but when her husband mentioned this year that he wanted to buy a gun to keep in the house, “I was scared to death.”

However, she agreed to take a firearms class and discovered that firing a gun could be pleasurable.

“I really surprised myself about how much I enjoyed it, particularly the competitive aspect,” said Jones, 30, of Long Beach. “I go to the shooting range at least once a week. It’s a great release of stress.”

Jones also found it intoxicating to shoot more powerful pistols such as .38- or .45-caliber weapons instead of the .22-caliber guns often recommended for women.

“No one had ever encouraged me to try a more powerful gun,” Jones said. “After the first time I shot a .45, I thought: ‘That’s amazing. I’m a woman, and I can handle this.’ ”

It is legal to keep firearms in the home or a place of business, and last year 28,071 firearms were legally purchased in Orange County, up from 26,823 in 1987, according to the state Department of Justice. Since the state requires only a one-time notification of a firearms sale, there is no way to tell how many Orange County residents overall own guns or how many firearms have been purchased illegally, said Margaret Bourff of the Department of Justice.

Carrying a concealed weapon, however, is against state law unless the gun owner has a permit. Such permits are rarely issued, except to some public officials or individuals who demonstrate the need for a concealed firearm. In Orange County, there were only 225 concealed weapons permits issued in 1988, according to state figures. The year before, only 10 of the 257 permits issued went to women.

Shooting someone with a concealed weapon is a felony, and local law enforcement agencies frown upon teaching people how to do this.

“We can’t condone any type of instruction for anything that’s against the law,” said Lt. Richard J. Olson, a spokesman for the Orange County Sheriff’s Department.

Tolley is careful to advise her students of the implications of shooting with a concealed weapon, including the likelihood of arrest and the possibility of going to prison. But in Tolley’s opinion, “it’s better to be judged by 12 than carried by six.”

“I’d take my chances,” Escandon said. As for the idea that an attacker will be able to take her gun away, Escandon said, “I’m not going to let anybody get that close to me.”

Although the women are staunch opponents of gun control, including the ban on assault rifles, they have been reluctant to disclose their use of guns to friends and family.

Escandon said that some members of her family still don’t know that she started shooting about six months ago and now owns a gun.

“The attitude of people when they learn you have a gun . . . it’s like all of a sudden I’m this vile person because I have a gun,” she said.

Jones said she took her co-workers by surprise when she mentioned she likes to shoot. “It’s been a more positive response than I expected,” she said. “You just have to get people to see that you’re buying it for self-protection, that you’re trained and know what you’re doing.”

Still, the question of killing another living thing, be it a deer, a dove or an attacker, can be a troubling one for women.

“You don’t shoot people to injure them,” Tolley told the class. “If you didn’t think it was a killing situation--kill or be killed--then you’d better not shoot somebody.”

Toni Bauer, a Garden Grove mother of two, said she has considered whether she is capable of shooting another person.

“I have no doubt that if someone threatened my children, I could do it,” Bauer said. “But if was just me . . . I don’t know.”