A Royal Hello for Norman?

“All very successful commanders are prima donnas, and must be so treated,” said Gen. George S. Patton Jr.

I suppose the Queen of England must watch Barbara Walters and David Frost and CNN, because she has developed a heck of a crush on our Gen. Norman Schwarzkopf. (The queen can step right up and join the rest of us.)

When she comes to Florida on May 14, on the second stage of her state visit to the United States, the queen hopes to meet with the Persian Gulf commander, perhaps in his own hometown of Tampa.

For weeks there have been rumors that the queen intends to confer upon the general the same kind of honorary knighthood that she gave to President Ronald Reagan.

Britain’s Nigel Dempster reports that the queen will spend three days in Washington, then head south to Florida and Texas for six days. Her meeting with Schwarzkopf depends on whether the general can be back home from the Gulf by that date. There are hopes he will be and reunited with his wife, Brenda, and their two daughters and son. Brenda Schwarzkopf was visiting England recently with her sister-in-law, Sally. The general has never been to Great Britain.

While she was in London, Brenda Schwarzkopf received a quantity of champagne that Harrod’s department store offered her, for toasting the general.

Phoebe Cates (Mrs. Kevin Kline in private life) was all set for the role of the blushing, virginal, newlywed-to-be in the Charles Shyer-Nancy Meyers remake of the old black-and-white MGM classic, “Father of the Bride.” (This is the team that did “Baby Boom.”) Then Mother Nature stepped in. Phoebe became pregnant, but her agents felt she could play the part before this became evident. The producers didn’t agree. So Phoebe is now out of the movie and her replacement is still being sought.

From what I hear, blushing, virginal young things are hard to find in Hollywood. Reps for the film have even gone to England to look, with no success. It seems most young actresses these days dress and look so sophisticated, so polished, so “tough” if you will, that even the truly virginal seem to have been “through the mill.”

According to Sandollar producer Howard Rosenman, this movie remake will be a straight update of the 1950 original. Steve Martin and Diane Keaton are to play the Spencer Tracy-Joan Bennett roles. Martin Short will be the supercilious “wedding coordinator.” And whatever sweet young thing takes over from Cates will have the burdensome knowledge that she is doing a role Elizabeth Taylor made famous.

Actually, in 1950, Miss Taylor was a virginal young thing. (She says she was, in any case.) The release of the film coincided with her disastrous first marriage--to Nicky Hilton.