Thanks to City Ordinance, He’s a Fugitive on the Roll

It is not uncommon for the artiste to suffer the indignity of exile: Byron, Chagall, Picasso, Chaplin, Solzhenitsyn, to name a few.

And now, to this melancholy roll call must be added another name: Sandy Snakenberg, 29.

He’s a cook at the Jyoti Bihanga vegetarian restaurant in Normal Heights and a damn fine roller skater.

Last weekend, Snakenberg won a 138-mile race from Fresno to Bakersfield in 9 hours and 22 minutes. A man from the Outdoor Rollerskating Assn. of America says the race was the longest ever held in the United States.

Is San Diego preparing to greet Snakenberg with a ticker-tape parade? It is not.

Snakenberg is a hunted man in America’s Finest City. There are two warrants out for his immediate arrest and incarceration.

His crime? Habitual roller-skating on public streets, mostly in the Hillcrest-North Park corridor.

A 1976 city ordinance makes it illegal to skate in the street. Skating is restricted to races, rinks and residential sidewalks.

Snakenberg has been ticketed dozens of times and even did a stretch in the slammer. Now he just ignores the tickets (which cost $69 each); hence, the warrants.

He’s seeking sanctuary in Berkeley, where public roller-skating is revered as an expression of radical politics.

“I love San Diego, but it’s not a town for skaters,” Snakenberg said from an undisclosed safehouse. “Berkeley is a mecca for skaters.”

James Fosbinder, a lawyer who runs a skating store in Mission Beach, hopes to convince prosecutors that the ordinance is outmoded:

“Here’s someone doing something healthy and non-polluting, and the city’s reaction is to try to put him into jail.”

Like all exiles, Snakenberg wants one last sentimental look.

He plans to sneak home for a 5-kilometer race Sunday in La Jolla. He’ll be the one skating just ahead of a cop waving an official piece of paper.

The Cola Wars

Here and there.

* Cola wars.

Pepsi Cola is said to have gotten a Big Boost when Gen. H. Norman Schwarzkopf was pictured drinking Diet Pepsi while dictating surrender terms to the Iraqis.

Now, Coca-Cola is fighting back: by donating $50,000 to Oceanside’s April 27 welcome-home bash for the troops. Look for the Coke logo to be Very Prominent.

* An exercise group for Christians is being formed in the South Bay: Believercise.

* Will someone please get a road atlas for the New York Times?

First a story about Camp Pendleton described Oceanside as “a suburb of Los Angeles.”

And now a story about a novelist manque possibly faking a recommendation from Joseph Wambaugh said the letter was mailed from San Diego, described as “nowhere near” Wambaugh’s home of Rancho Santa Fe.

* North County bumper sticker: “Fur: The Ultimate Sadist Symbol.”

Going the Distance

A few good men.

In a burst of patriotism, the Mustang Ranch bordello outside Reno is offering 24 hours of free services to any serviceman returning from Operation Desert Storm.

Normally, the going rate for 24 hours of such action is $1,000.

So a couple of bargain-minded Marines just returned to Camp Pendleton decided to drive to Reno to collect the offer.

They showed up in full dress-blue uniforms. And were pictured, still in uniform, with two game-looking prostitutes on the front-page of the Reno Gazette-Journal.

“We’re Marines, and we know how to last,” one of the Marines was quoted. “But we might need another two girls if these get tired.”

The story and picture provoked a flurry of protest letters and calls from readers, who thought it made prostitution look patriotic.

The brass at Camp Pendleton is also not amused.

Look for some strong questions to be asked when the two fighters-turned-lovers return from leave.