“You’ve been going to the race track...

“You’ve been going to the race track far too frequently,” she says. Look out, Mathilda. This conversation has been brewing for some time.

Then she gets right into it.

She says: “Last night in your sleep you kept yelling, ‘Box the two, five and nine!’

“And your head’s forever buried in the Racing Form or some track program. Sometimes it seems I’m stuck with someone who thinks he stepped right out of a Damon Runyon story.”

Our eyes start to glaze over. She calls us on it.

“What’s gotten into you?” she says.

“Lookingforthateasystreet,” we say.

“It’d be nice if you dropped out of the whole scene,” she says. “Scratched, if you will.”

“You mean declared,” we say.

“What you need is some outside interests,” she says.

And she tells us all about the Martell French Festival that will be held at the Santa Monica Civic Auditorium. The event, featuring French eats, beverages and culture, will run from 1 to 11 p.m. Friday, Saturday and noon to 8 p.m. Sunday. Admission is $15. For information call (213) 556-4410.

Not too shabby, we say. Sounds like 5-to-2 odds.

She pats our midsection.

“Looks like you’re five pounds over, Seabiscuit,” she says, suggesting we get in a bit of running ourself in a 10-mile race being held Sunday at the Century Plaza Hotel in Century City. The race, which starts at 7:30 a.m., will help raise funds for a drug abuse education program. Entry fee is $18, $20 day of the race. For information call (213) 826-3335.

Us? Run? A long shot. But we’d love to watch.

By the way, we say, who’s the favorite?