You may recall Pirate Radio as the...

You may recall Pirate Radio as the rock station that decorated the roadways for a time with billboards that declared, “Screw the Rules.”

The campaign was a ratings failure for KQLZ-FM--and not only because the ads were banned by the city of Irwindale. But now the station is b-a-a-a-c-k with another uplifting message: “Less Music by Dead Guys.”

Refusing to say whether this is an attack on oldies, program director Carey Curelop remarked, “You can make your own interpretation. We’re just trying to get a laugh.”

One non-laugher was a driver who spotted the new slogan on his way to a big band concert in Alpine Village in Torrance. He wrote: “Aside from its bad taste, what struck me about the ad is that at least the dead musicians of my generation died from natural causes.”

B efore we change the channel here, we should add that Pirate Radio does not play Elvis songs. Nice to see the station makes one exception.

The enclosed coupon, unearthed by reader E. Powell of the City of Industry, raises a question: If you show up with it at the eatery making the offer near downtown L.A., will the delivery man give you a ride home?

One of the most unusual pin-up beauties of the Persian Gulf war was the 35-year-old Bel-Air Chevy of Cpl. Julian Gonzalez of Venice.

A tank mechanic, he was called to active duty just as he had nearly finished restoring the two-tone blue sedan.

“I pinned up a picture of the car on one of the tank posters that were issued to us,” Gonzalez said. “Everyone kidded me that it looked like a tank.”

It was a symbol of life on the home front--in more ways than Gonzalez then imagined. He had no sooner finished sprucing up the car the other day than it was stolen.

“I woke up about 5:30 a.m. and I was reading a manual on servicing the exhaust manifold--it had been making a little noise,” he said. “Then I walked outside with a wrench in my hand and it was gone.”

The theft reminded Gonzalez, 31, of why he feels nostalgic for the ‘50s. “It seems like nowadays there are so many people walking around out there with no compassion,” he said. “It seems like people were friendlier back then.”

It could be the next craze: Computer dieting.

The Center for Weight Loss has a machine named “Bert” who’s available for consultations. For those more comfortable messaging female computers, the Brentwood company also has a machine named “Liza.”

Typical programmed questions from Bert and Liza include: “Was one of your parents frequently critical?” or, “How often do you tell the truth?” or, “Does talking about your marriage embarrass you?”

“We’ve found that what might not have come out in years of psychotherapy has surfaced for some patients who’ve responded to the computer’s questions,” a spokesman said.

Not only that, but think of all the calories you can burn off by banging away at those computer keys.

miscelLAny:

Glendora is the home of the nation’s largest growth of bougainvillea, a plant originally brought there on whaling ships in the 1880s. The scarlet vines, which are currently in bloom, reach a height of about 70 feet. The plant is a state historical landmark.