TV Reviews : ‘The Last Prostitute’: A Predictable Tale

Despite the lure of internationally known sex symbol Sonia Braga in the title role, “The Last Prostitute” (an original TV movie premiering tonight at 9 on Lifetime cable) turns out to be a gentle coming-of-age tale and pointed morality lesson, with just the slightest bits of saucy dialogue and no hubba-hubba. It’s meant to be heartwarming, not loins-stirring, but generates not the slightest heat in zones erogenous or otherwise.

Braga is visited here by two teen-agers who’ve traveled halfway across the country to Texas in search of her favors, based on an uncle’s tales of her legendary prowess. Unfortunately for their intentions of sexual initiation, Braga has retired from a life of prostitution and is happily breeding--horses. The boys’ disappointment at putting off this rite of passage is only slightly mitigated by her offer to take them on as ranch hands.

From this early point on, the film turns into a slightly more mature version of the children’s lesson Goofus and Gallant. In the former role as the bully of the two is David Kaufman, who refuses to believe Braga won’t ever give him the physical satisfaction he wants and finally resolves to sabotage her burgeoning love affair with a handsome local horse trader who’s unaware of her past. The resolutely nicer kid is Wil Wheaton, who really does come of age, as they say, in all the predictable non-sexual ways.

“The Last Prostitute” may be the filmic equivalent of a hooker with a heart of gold, but it ain’t exactly love.