Spreading the Word on Alkmaar : Medieval city is famous among visitors who want to say ‘cheese’ and a lot more.

Any way you cut it, 66,000 pounds of cheese will spread a lot of crackers, bait a lot of traps and keep the folks at the local hamburger stand busy at the grill making cheeseburgers for years. Now stack all those golden wheels out on the ancient market square of this joyful medieval city every Friday morning from April through October at precisely 10 o’clock, and it’s a colorful spectacle indeed.

Alkmaar has been one of the Netherlands’ largest cheese markets for more than four centuries, laying out great mounds of Edam and Gouda for prospective buyers from all over the world. Just 45 minutes from Amsterdam by train, it’s an entertaining pageant no visitor to this country should miss.

The Cheese Carriers Guild, formed in 1622, is made up of men from four groups, each wearing a sparkling white uniform and a straw hat of red, blue, green or yellow to signify his team. Once a batch of cheese has been selected by a buyer, two carriers haul it on cheese barrows hung from their shoulders to the Weighing House, a delightfully ornate, 14th-Century building that was once a chapel and still looks it.

The sight of these men scurrying back and forth with immense loads of cheese and Groucho Marx strides provides two hours of continuous entertainment. Since 80 cheeses on one barrow can weigh 360 pounds, the Groucho imitation is understandable.

Much of the cheese has already been spoken for by wholesalers and exporters (about 70% is exported), but the occasional haggling between seller and buyer as they tap, smell, squeeze and taste the cheese is an amusing exchange, always sealed with a simple slap of the hands.

And just to add to the festivities, cheerful Dutch girls wander around in their starched bonnets and wooden shoes explaining procedures to onlookers, while the carillon in the Weighing House belfry serenades all with old Dutch folk songs.

Alkmaar’s allure doesn’t end with cheese. There are lovely old canals with cruise boats passing the town’s historic buildings; pretty little 17th-Century almshouses and gardens; an ornate 16th-Century fish market open every Friday morning; an equally ancient windmill still grinding the town’s flour; surrounding fields of tulips and other flowers; plus the charming, 2nd-Century village of Bergen on the nearby coast.

And just in case you haven’t had enough of cheese, there’s a Cheese Museum in the Weighing House that will tell one and all as much or more than they ever care to know about the stuff.

How long/how much? Alkmaar is a one-day town, easy enough to do on a day trip from Amsterdam. But Bergen and seaside Bergen aan Zee make good overnight stops for absorbing the local atmosphere. Lodging costs are moderate, dining about the same.

Getting settled in: Alkmaar must honestly be called “hotel poor,” with nothing really acceptable within the town. So the best bet is to bed down in Bergen three miles away and use the frequent bus service from the main square to Alkmaar.

Hotel Pension De Viersprong in Bergen is a former home, very bright and cheerful, with a small garden and just steps from the main square and bus stop. Bedrooms are very contemporary and compact, and the dining room serves all meals. There’s a tiny bar, TV in all rooms and plenty of parking.

Parkhotel is right on Bergen’s main square, with 31 pretty bedrooms and a dining room with crisp linens, fresh flowers and silver candlesticks on each table. There’s also a terrace that is roofed and heated during inclement weather, plus a sidewalk cafe. Parkhotel has most of the big-hotel amenities and is very comfortable.

Hotel Marijke, like the Parkhotel, is a four-star place, with 85 bedrooms, full dining room, bar-lounge and winter-garden terrace, and just 100 yards from the town square. While bedrooms are furnished simply but comfortably, the public areas work hard at being gezellige (warm and cozy), with lots of greenery and knickknacks about.

Regional food and drink: With the North Sea in their back yard, Alkmaar and Bergen, like most of the Netherlands, lean heavily on marvelous fresh seafood: superb sole, several types of cod, salmon, herring, eel, rock lobster and lots of other shellfish. Slip tong sole is a fish for the gods when it’s grilled simply.

Chinese and Indonesian restaurants with magnificent rijsttafel (rice table) meals are popular throughout the Netherlands, and the difficult trick is to avoid ordering too much; some rijsttafel spreads include more than a dozen meat, fish, vegetable and fruit dishes to be eaten with the rice. And go easy on the Indonesian hot sauces as they will melt fillings with the first spoonful.

Dutch beer needs no further accolades, and genever (Dutch gin) is quite different from the English variety. Drink it straight with a cold beer. Strong Dutch coffee is some of Europe’s best, particularly with the traditional midmorning apple cake.

Good local dining: De Nachtegaal, opposite City Hall in Alkmaar, is a perfect example of the typical Dutch restaurant, with wood paneling, stained-glass windows and an easy-does-it atmosphere without pretense. The Nightingale is a good lunchtime stop, having a three-course Tourist Menu (700 restaurants in Holland have them at $11.50) offering the likes of the fabled Dutch green pea soup or a house pate, then a veal, lamb or chicken main dish with vegetables, ending with a choice of desserts. Lighter fare might be sandwiches (ham, beef, chicken) for about $4, several omelets for about $4.75, and the beloved croquettes.

At mid-village in Bergen, Het Huis met de Pilaren (The House with Pillars) is a rustic-elegant restaurant with beamed ceilings, old copper pots, a central open fireplace and mounted game horns on the walls, yet the place settings and menu would do credit to a much fancier restaurant. The lobster bisque ($5) was superb, and the coquilles St. Jacques its equal at $10.50. A lamb fillet in a green pepper sauce ($20) was delicious.

Surveying the red lacquer and gilt, guests might think they had just walked into a Ming Dynasty temple upon entering the Peking Restaurant on Alkmaar’s main square. Rijsttafel is the big attraction here, a sensible one of seven dishes going for $10.50. A more moderate nasi goreng (a fried rice dish with various ingredients) will cost from $3.75 to $9. And again, order carefully or be prepared to take much of the meal out in a cardboard carton. Beer is a soothing natural with Indonesian food.

Going first-class: Hof van Sonoy (Nieuwesloot, Alkmaar) was a 14th-Century monastery and later the palace of a local governor. It is now an exquisite restaurant. Beneath soaring ceilings and chandeliers, the decor is a contemporary treatment of regal surroundings in pastel colors and white wicker.

A tureen of sole and smoked salmon with avocado salad ($11.50) leads into a choice of fish and shellfish with pasta and a lobster and herb sauce for $23. Or roasted breasts of pigeon with cherries and a red beer sauce for the same. During summer, the restaurant offers at least 10 different cheese-dish possibilities: soups, salads, tureens and a lunchtime platter. Note the gorgeous little gateway and 17th-Century tympanum at the entry.

On your own: After shooting several rolls of film at the cheese market and its surroundings, take a cruise of the city from the dock on a nearby canal. Then walk down busy Lange Straat past the handsome, late-Gothic City Hall (visit its Renaissance chambers) and to the 15th-Century Church of St. Lawrence, noted for its two historic organs.

Visit the Biermuseum de Boom, in a 17th-Century brewery, and sample a variety of beers in the museum’s basement bar. Or take the children to the Municipal Museum to marvel at the permanent collection of antique toys.

Bergen is very much a family vacation village, with everything within easy walking distance of the main square. Nearby Bergen aan Zee is spread out along the endless sand dunes and beaches on this part of the coast.

If the thought of the North Sea’s frigid waters gives you pause, head back to Bergen or Alkmaar, have a good Dutch coffee and pastry at a sidewalk cafe and listen to the lively music of a street organ that is probably grinding away happily within earshot.

GUIDEBOOK: Sampling Cheeses of Alkmaar

Getting there: Fly KLM nonstop from Los Angeles to Amsterdam, or Delta, Northwest or TWA with stops. Through May 31, KLM is offering a special advance-purchase, round-trip ticket for $800. From June 1 through Aug. 31, the price on the above airlines will rise to $1,050. A train ticket from Amsterdam to Alkmaar is about $8 round trip.

A few fast facts: The Dutch guilder recently sold for 1.73 per U.S. dollar, about 57 cents each. May through mid-September is the best time for a visit. It’s rare to find anyone in the Netherlands who doesn’t speak English, usually very well.

Where to stay: Hotel Pension De Viersprong (Prinsesselaan 50, Bergen; $60 B&B; double); Parkhotel (Breelaan 19, Bergen; $60-$70 double B&B;); Hotel Marijke (Dorpsstraat 23, Bergen; $50-$70 double B&B;).

For more information: Call the Netherlands Board of Tourism at (213) 678-8802, or write (90 New Montgomery St., Suite 305, San Francisco 94105) for brochures on Alkmaar and Bergen, another on Amsterdam, a map of the country and facts and prices on the Holland Rail Pass. There is also a brochure on the 1992 Floriade, a once-a-decade gigantic flower show held in the Netherlands through October.