Topic A : A Different Spin on the World Around Us : Don’t Toy With Us!
You can’t believe the toys you’re seeing this year? The Slime? The Gak? The Koosh Balls? The horses and trolls--each with hair, clothes, houses, furniture and friends? The Throw-Yos and the Magic Potty Baby?
If you think the industry stuff is far-out, here are some of the toys on our drawing board.
Baby Madonna: Battery-run toddler lurches across floor, drops her diapers. Working eyelashes, working tongue. Cannot sing but croaks two refrains: “Material Baby” and “Money, money, money.” Comes with wooden cross, leather halter, pet dog, Kwell powder, Maalox.
My Little Cutie Car: Little cars in neon colors with matching combable hair! Collect regular-size Cutie Coupes, Cutie Convertibles, Cutie Cabs, baby Kitschy Cars. New multicultural diversity line, with race-appropriate headlights, real gender-specific working wheels.
Available with sets of clothing, from underwear to outerwear, plus accessories: wheel covers, hood hats, headlight bows. Sold separately: fold-up garage, three-story parking high-rise, bodywork boutique.
Nose Goop: Colorless, odorless, formless, absolutely safe to eat. Available in 2-ounce and 4-ounce containers. When pinched off, small snippets dry and harden within minutes, creating make-your-own designer boogers. Surprise your friends and family! Includes resealable plastic bag for storage.
Put-Together Ride-On Toy (per “easy-assembly” instructions): Defold tissue sheets. Bring A close to G, making first to close side F. Slide M forward and behind. Adding 14 last steps, resultance is a wheelbarrow or a tricycle, dependence on situation of seat and number of final wheels.
Choose preference color from three (4) sets prepared decals. Cover all surfaces with utmost careful.
Autonomous Play Cube (APC): Child-powered, natural-color wooden box with four hand-eye coordinates--limbs that move up-down, in-out, to-fro and hither-yon. Each limb numbered (1 to 4) to teach quantity value. Top of box printed “ABC” to encourage reading readiness. Guaranteed to last forever, virtually unused.
Wack-O: Takes off where Frisbees, Nerfs and Hula-Hoops left off! Toss it: It flies through the air! Shoot it: It hits a target! Drop it: It falls to the ground!
Made of flexible polyethylene triaminol synthenex. Safe for 2 feet, 6 inches and over. One size (breadbox), one color (gray). Available with flashing lights and “return” button. Coming soon: Weird-O and Wonk-O.
