End-of-the-year honors: Joe Shea of Hollywood says...

End-of-the-year honors: Joe Shea of Hollywood says he deserves “an Only in L.A. Oscar” for giving us a scoop that merited a mention in Esquire’s “Dubious Achievements” issue.

Shea told us about a priest who revealed to his parishioners how a young, guilt-ridden man had come to him to surrender two articles of clothing stolen during the L.A. riots. The items were a pair of Ava Gardner’s bloomers and a bra worn by “Married . . . With Children” star Katey Sagal, both taken from the bra museum at Frederick’s of Hollywood.

We hardly need add that there’s no truth to Esquire’s quip that the items “haven’t been seen since.”

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List of the Day: At the start of each year it’s customary for newspapers to look into the future, comfortable in the knowledge that hardly anyone ever checks back on the forecasts.

One who did check back was John Weaver, author of “El Pueblo Grande,” a history of L.A. In a 1931 issue of The Times, Weaver found the following experts’ predictions about what life would be like in the current era:

1. “We will be communicating with our departed dead.”

2. “It may be that science will in time discover how to transform atomic energy into power. If this vision is realized, even partially, the curse which fell to Adam will be lifted, and heavy manual labor will almost disappear from life.”

3. “(The liberated woman) will lay down the terms on which she will reproduce the race.”

4. “One can leave New York after breakfast and arrive in Los Angeles in time for evening dinner.”

5. “Substitutes for gin, with 40 times the potency and no ill effects, will be on sale at soda fountains.”

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People’s Republic report: At first we suspected that one of our colleagues had been to his favorite gin soda fountain when he told us he saw a Santa Monica city truck with letters on the side that said: “CULT AND CREATION VICE DEPT.”

Then he explained that a closer look revealed that some of the sign had been erased, altering the original title, “CULTURAL AND RECREATION SERVICES DEPT.”

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Speaking of vice: A marquee at an Alhambra theater seems to agree with critics who contend that the new Danny DeVito-Jack Nicholson film is a whitewashed version of a crooked union leader’s life.

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Dueling dealers: Ed Kysar of Reseda found one classified ad offering a last edition of the L.A. Herald Examiner for $40 and another offering the last edition for $400. “The reason for the discrepancy,” Kysar concluded, “must be that the person with the $400 edition also delivers.”

miscelLAny:

The Beverly Hills Post Office at 312 S. Beverly Drive is believed to be the only one in the nation with valet parking.