Mission Control, this subpoena’s for you: When...

Mission Control, this subpoena’s for you: When Columbia Pictures announced that it would advertise a movie on the side of an unmanned rocket launched by NASA next month, L.A. advertising man Robert Lorsch was shocked.

After all, a decade ago, he met with NASA to suggest a similar venture. Lorsch envisioned space shuttle flights in which astronauts hold up plaques bearing the logos of companies.

NASA termed his plan “inappropriate.” But, he claims, “assurances were given that if NASA ever were to undertake such an effort, we would have the right to pursue it.” Instead, an Atlanta company was chosen to negotiate with Columbia, which Lorsch says is a “violation of a copyrighted presentation made on a discreet and confidential basis.”

NASA has given Lorsch no explanation for the alleged snub. (Only in L.A. couldn’t link up with the agency either on Wednesday.) So Lorsch says he has no choice but to sue NASA.

In light of the Kim Basinger court decision--she’s the actress who owes $8.9 million for reneging on a promise to star in a movie--who knows what will happen? Lorsch could be piloting the next space shuttle mission.

Designer firewood: Ken Finch of Westlake Village, who found the accompanying ad in a local paper, says it proves the adage: “Nothing like a roaring sofa on a cold winter night.”

My son, the candidate: L.A.’s 13th District council race is heating up. As we mentioned Wednesday, the color brochure of candidate Tom Riley carries a photo of a messy tortilla concoction along with Riley’s account of how he fought to have “bad burritos” banned from his junior high school cafeteria in the eighth grade.

Now, district resident Ann James has received a letter touting rival Tom LaBonge--from LaBonge’s mother. Enclosed was a potholder which, James figures, is Mom’s ways of saying she “won’t let us get burned on bad burritos.”

Speaking of dead meat: Niki Tennant, who snapped today’s photo in a Long Beach market, figures live butchers are more efficient than the other variety.

SigAlert to the stars: Tourists listening to KNX radio trafficmeister Bill Keene must have felt their pulses quicken Wednesday. He reported that a truck carrying half a dozen giant replicas of the Oscar was parked on a median of the Hollywood Freeway after a couple of the statuettes tipped over. But that’s not all. The motorist who phoned in the tip to Keene was actor Richard Crenna. No, Crenna didn’t pick up an Oscar.

miscelLAny:

Earliest holiday sale of all time? Michele Mooney of L.A. came across an ad from a company advertising a decorative plate titled, “A Visit from St. Nicholas,” which is guaranteed to become “part of each year’s Christmas celebration.” To qualify for the offer, readers are told they must respond by May 10.