Engaging in Debate on Buying Diamonds
A h, spring--when a young man’s fancy lightly turns to thoughts of jewelry financing.
Yes, it’s the wedding season, and brides-to-be, as well as the bosses of the diamond cartel, are grinning in their sleep.
Is it possible, we wondered, to satisfy aesthetics, marital token-and-pledge requirements and the pocketbook factor while still being able to slip something on his or her finger that looks spiffy and reasonably eternal?
HE: I don’t necessarily want to start off by being cynical about wedded bliss, so let’s just call this realism: For any guy who doesn’t have a lot of ready cash, shopping for engagement and wedding rings comes pretty close to being a no-win situation.
If the guy digs deep and springs for a rock the size of an asteroid, he eats spaghetti and ketchup for months and months and the happy couple get to live in a hovel for the first few years of their married life. His bride, however, is thrilled. On the other hand, if he goes for a bargain, his fiancee will show it around in order to ensure that the world knows he’s a cheapskate.
SHE: Hey dude . The guy’s in love. He wants to spring for the stone that means forever. And what makes you think his bride-to-be would choose a mega-rock over decent digs? And, it’s only natural for a woman to want to flash an engagement ring--it means she’s met a guy who can commit (rarer than a pink De Beers these days).
According to Marion Halfacre, owner of Traditional Jewelers in Newport Beach, most young couples don’t lose their budget-conscious heads when they lose their hearts. On display in the Bridal Corner of his Fashion Island store are wedding rings ranging from $100 for a simple gold band to a sparkler that costs as much as a lot on Newport Bay. Most couples spend from $5,000 to $10,000 on their rings, he says. And they pay cash.
HE: Teresa Saldivar, who owns Teresa’s Jewelry in downtown Santa Ana, says that most of her customers pay cash, too, after saving for some time, but the range tends to fall between $500 and $3,000. Most of her customers are Latino, she says, and they tend to go for what she called “the trio”: her engagement ring, his and hers wedding bands, all matching. Her Anglo customers usually opt for variety: she picks out her own engagement and wedding rings, he goes for something completely different.
But the Anglos are missing out in a big way. Get this: according to Saldivar, tradition in many Latino cultures often dictates that while the groom still pops for the engagement ring, the best man and maid of honor pay for the wedding bands. “Actually,” said Saldivar, “the (wedding) couple may end up paying almost zero.”
This is the working definition of a really good gig.
SHE: Jo Qualls of Tiffany & Co. at South Coast Plaza says the one-carat, round solitaire diamond is, and will probably always be, the most popular engagement ring. “It’s classic, elegant, timeless,” she says. That diamond--depending on its color, clarity and cut--can cost from $5,000 to $15,000. Young women today like to wear it with an “eternity ring”--a gold band ringed in diamonds, she says.
Another hot rock, according to Halfacre, is the Princess-cut diamond: “It’s square with lots of facets. Very brilliant.”
HE: I realize that diamonds are sacred territory for women, but let me put in an appeal for a bit of proportion and taste. Too many women whose husbands have money take the greatest glee in flashing the boulder-size diamonds on their left hands. These elephantine rocks are used as a social weapon and may or may not be a true token of love. To me, they’re the equivalent of a man’s cinder block-like pinky ring: a curiosity at best, grotesque at worst. OK, so it’s big and it’s shiny. So what?
SHE: It’s a matter of taste. If a woman wears a huge diamond on her left hand--and that’s the only jewelry she is wearing--it is a beautiful thing to behold. I appreciate the fact that some women love wearing large diamonds.
But they go wrong when they overdo it. A huge rock makes a huge fashion statement. Too often, women over-adorn themselves, with glitz on their ears, necks, lapels, wrists and fingers.
Social weapon, eh? Interesting point. It is true that in some circles the woman with the biggest rock wins--gets the social nod for seeming financial success (But, is it paid for? Is it real?).
But in the long run, where does it really get her? It’s what’s in her head that gets a woman somewhere.
HE: I’m still a less-is-more advocate, particularly when it comes to men’s rings. Two are the absolute limit: a wedding band and one other, possibly a class ring. Any more than that and even Al Gore starts to look like a leg breaker for the Mob. Exception: this rule does not apply to Elvis.
SHE: You’d better get married soon. The in ring for a man, says Qualls, is a simple, solid gold or platinum--or both--semi-domed band.
Me? I’ll keep the nice size diamond I begged my husband to buy after we’d been married a couple of decades. My first ring, the sweet little white gold one with the double row of little diamonds, sits in a jewelry box.
Someday a grandchild will have it.
