It’s Not Such a Sorry State With Hospital Valet Parking

In these troubling times for California, it’s important to trumpet the things that give the state its unique personality.

(Actually, it’s not the least bit important to do that, but play along, OK?)

Amid all the pessimism in California--what with the recession and urban problems and the immigration controversy--we’ve lost the sense of our own importance.

After all, we’re still California! We’re not . . . Indiana, for God sakes. We’ll never be New Jersey or Georgia.

Let’s not forget who we are. Who knew before Californians that quartz crystals can heal the sick?

What other state had a commission on self-esteem?

Who pioneered right-turn-on-red and made it work?

Does anybody else have a professional sports team named after a movie, like Orange County’s own Mighty Ducks?

So, let’s take some time to celebrate the California-ness of California.

My favorite current tidbit is the fact that the Hoag Hospital emergency room offers valet parking.

That’s right, folks. A nice guy in a white shirt and dark pants by the name of Gus Rendon was camped outside the door Thursday morning, just waiting for anyone who might show up battered, bloodied, bruised or just feeling lousy.

If people need assistance getting out of their car, Rendon explained, he summons someone from inside. In the meantime, Rendon gives the driver a ticket and parks their car for them. Assuming the person doesn’t need to be admitted, they’re usually ready to leave within two hours.

Do they tip? I asked him.

“Really, no,” Rendon said. “Maybe one time a week, someone will give a dollar. The sign says it’s complimentary.”

Rendon helped me realize another thing that California has going for it. Correct me if I’m wrong, but California must be the Valet Parking Capital of the World.

Chad Sonnenberg, operations manager for Celebrity Valet Parking Service, said a Beverly Hills restaurant used the first valet parking service in the 1950s. Sonnenberg knows the business pretty well, so I felt a rush of pride when I told him about Hoag and he confessed he hadn’t heard about that.

“That is pushing it,” he said. “That’s interesting. I’ve heard of valet for quite a few things, but never for emergency rooms.”

We discussed the valet parking business for a while, and Sonnenberg said he used to park cars in Los Angeles. “Hollywood is very uptight,” Sonnenberg said. “I avoid Hollywood. I used to work at Columbia Bar & Grill, it’s a hot spot for all the stars. I’ve parked cars for Tony Danza and Molly Ringwald, and I’d say Tony Danza is the nicest one (of the stars). Most of them are really uptight. It’s the traffic, their schedules, and the parking situation is really bad, some of the lots are a quarter-mile away, it takes forever to get the car around, and it’s just terrible.”

The worst thing about the stars, Sonnenberg said, is that “they don’t tip.”

I also got an earful from Nancy Clifford, general manager of Valet America Parking Co. in La Puente. Valet parking attendants don’t have as cushy a job as it may seem, she said.

“It’s really rather a difficult job,” she said. “You have to be on the lookout. A lot of times, customers come in or they’ve been drinking, and you really have to watch all the cars. After people have had a few drinks or whatever else they do inside, they can be really difficult people to deal with. Movie stars all look glamorous and show such a positive image, but it’s not really like that.”

I begged her not to name names, and she didn’t. “But I’ll tell you that after people work in the valet service, 99.9% of them won’t go out to the places themselves. They’re just tired of all these people, the hostility, how mean they are. You see people in a different way.”

My happy-face notion of the great California valet parking industry was darkening, so I thought I’d better quit while I was ahead.

After all, I wanted this to be an uplifting column.

Then, about mid-afternoon, Carol Heywood, spokeswoman for Hoag, returned my phone call. She said valet parking is being offered while hospital expansion is under way and that when the work is done, the service will be discontinued.

Thanks a lot, I said, that kind of blows the wacky California image. She was apologetic.

These conversations are exactly what’s wrong with California these days. I wonder if all these people understand the impact of telling the truth in a case like this.

I mean, is this really a good time to be bursting bubbles about Southern California?

Dana Parsons’ column appears Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. Readers may reach Parsons by writing to him at The Times Orange County Edition, 1375 Sunflower Ave., Costa Mesa, Calif. 92626, or calling (714) 966-7821.