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COMMENTARIES ON VIOLENCE : We Live in Comfortable Suburbia and Now We, Too, Are Afraid : The fear in South County is startling. But Steve Wood’s death has reawakened a commitment to community--and ourselves.

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<i> Nicole Marie Martin is a senior at Capistrano Valley High School. </i>

My best friend carries pepper spray when she goes jogging. It’s always in her purse when we go out. This defense would be useless if she confronted an attacker carrying a semiautomatic pistol, but it makes her feel safe.

People in Orange County are increasingly doing things to make them feel protected, even if in vain.

Violent crimes are not limited to rival gang activity. Video cameras capture young people killing shop owners for small amounts of money. Children are being shot. Metal detectors are becoming a necessity in many schools.

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Students are forced to “watch their backs” for fear someone may succeed in carrying out a grudge by firing a gun. Every year, 400,000 students are victims of violent crimes. Increased violence may not be a problem in many Orange County schools, but students are still frightened by the images they see outside of the school.

I remember complaining to my parents about being raised in Mission Viejo because it falsely sheltered me from reality. I felt guilty because others lived with daily violence from which I was protected. My only exposure to violence was television and newspapers. Even these images seemed intangible and unreal.

That changed when I heard about Steve Woods. It was terrifying to learn that a few miles from where I live, a boy my age had been murdered in such a brutal way. My image of Orange County as a safe haven had changed. TV violence became real, and personal.

Even before the death of Steve Woods, I had grown more distrustful of strangers. My government class took a poll. One of the questions was whether we thought people were basically good or evil. When I read the question I immediately pictured myself walking alone down a city street. I realized that I wouldn’t trust anybody walking past me. I was surprised to find myself answer that people were basically evil. I have acquired a somewhat cynical view of human nature.

Increasing violence and our responses to it are both related to wider feelings of helplessness. Many young people feel overwhelmed with pressures--from school, peers, parents and an uncertain future. Violence, like drugs, provides a false sense of power and identity. Other teens feel forced into gangs for protection, only to discover the futility of that tactic.

The tragedy of Steve Woods has reawakened a commitment to community. Sustaining this commitment will not be easy. It will require rethinking our attitudes--toward education, police officers, cultural diversity and personal responsibility. Instead of continuing the cycle of fear and cynicism, we need to restore a sense of hope in the community and within ourselves.

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