Abstinence Statement Criticized as Anti-Gay

Mayor Sandra L. Genis has declared this week Abstinence Week in Costa Mesa, an official reminder that the only foolproof way to avoid getting AIDS through sex is not to have sex.

Health educators generally welcomed the declaration, but said sexual abstinence cannot be encouraged as the only defense against pregnancy and disease. They also berated as inflammatory a statement that was issued by Abstinence Week organizers.

“The red ‘AIDS’ ribbon is a lie,” read a statement distributed by the group. “It promotes a lifestyle and education that allows sex with a condom.”

The statement, with a white ribbon pinned to one side, was distributed last week at the City Council meeting where the mayor made her declaration. The text also attacked the reliability of condoms and added, “the red ‘AIDS’ ribbon is stained with blood, blood that could be infected and kill me.”

Abstinence Week is not a week without sex, but a time for people to reflect on the benefits of delaying sexual activity until marriage, according to organizer Barbara Whitacre. “We need to give support to our teens who want to be abstinent.”

Genis made the declaration, which covers the week that began Sunday, at Whitacre’s request.

“I thought it was a worthwhile thing to declare,” Genis said. “Heaven knows it’s the only foolproof thing we’ve got against some of these things.”

Costa Mesa is the only city in the county to declare Abstinence Week. The council has traditionally given the mayor authority to make such pronouncements.

But after questions were raised about the organizers’ statement, the mayor was quick to distance herself from its specifics and noted that it was not part of the official declaration. “I didn’t write the thing, and I just kind of glanced at it,” she said. “That is not an official city statement.”

And after learning that some critics considered the statement anti-gay, the organizers revised it to eliminate references to the red ribbon, which has become an international symbol of the fight against AIDS.

Organizers say they hope Abstinence Week will be recognized by other cities as well. Whitacre said the idea came to her during a conversation with friends at a meeting at Calvary Chapel of Costa Mesa.

Whitacre gave a brief speech in favor of abstinence at the Feb. 22 council meeting and passed out the white-ribboned statements.

“I think it’s anti-gay,” said David Martin, president of the California Assn. of AIDS Agencies, a statewide organization that provides assistance to local health educators. “I don’t view that (red) ribbon as an endorsement of activities that would lead to HIV infection.”

After learning of Martin’s comments, Clark Emerson, an Orange resident who wrote the statement, discarded the roughly 900 flyers he had prepared. “I was not trying to offend any individuals,” he said. “I was trying to make a point about an idea.”

He wrote a new statement focusing on the risks of condoms and the benefits of abstinence. To teach a young person to depend on condoms, which no one believes are 100% effective at preventing HIV transmission, is wrong and deadly, Emerson said.

But Martin said he wonders why the council endorsed Abstinence Week after Whitacre presented such an offensive statement. “I think it speaks to a lack of awareness on the part of the mayor and City Council,” he said. Several council members said they first saw the white ribbons and statements on their chairs when the Feb. 22 meeting began.

Genis acknowledged that she spoke with Whitacre about Abstinence Week several days before the meeting, but said she had not carefully read the short statement.

“I don’t think it is anti-gay,” Genis said after reviewing the statement. “If people choose to take things personally, then that’s their prerogative.”

Council member Mary Hornbuckle, who also did not read the whole statement before the meeting began, said she wished the council had talked about it beforehand.

“I would have found that offensive,” she said of the statement, “simply because this is a personal decision.”

Hornbuckle said she is concerned about the appearance of a council endorsement for the statement. “I suspect it’s an area that government doesn’t have a lot of business in,” she said. “It probably should be a decision made by the whole council.”

In November, Genis was criticized by local arts officials after she refused to issue a written proclamation of A Day Without Art as part of a worldwide observance of the toll AIDS has taken. Genis did verbally declare the day, in the same way she declared Abstinence Week. She said she reserves written proclamations for residents or local organizations deserving of recognition for special achievements.

Several county health educators interviewed by The Times said they approved of Abstinence Week, but all emphasized that abstinence should be presented along with condom education and other safer-sex lessons.

“If people are having sex, it’s hard to get them to stop,” said Jack Herzberg, program director for the AIDS Response Program, the oldest AIDS-education organization in the county. “I don’t think that promoting abstinence as the only alternative is reasonable.

“We always present abstinence as an option,” Herzberg said. “And for people who choose to be sexually active, they need to know how to keep themselves safe.”

Emerson, Whitacre and others criticize health educators who talk of abstinence and also give a frank discussion of condoms and other birth control.

“I believe that when you mix the message like that, it discredits the choice for abstinence,” said Priscilla Hurley, director of Choices/Teen Awareness Inc., a non-sectarian Anaheim group that has taught abstinence classes in North County school districts.

“Many of them hear that waiting is a good idea, but if you can’t wait, use a condom,” Hurley said of students. “But when I ask them what that communicates, 90% of them respond that that gives them permission.”

Hurley says her group steers clear of religious messages when it teaches young people how to maintain abstinence. Whitacre said Abstinence Week also has no religious agenda. “To me it’s not a religious issue; it’s a health issue,” she said.

“More and more of the programs are looking at the benefits of delaying sexual activity,” Penny Weismuller, county manger for disease control, said. But she stressed that “abstinence is a part of a total message that recognizes what’s going on with young people. You don’t just present either side of the message.”