Otherwise, She Says, They’re Quite Ordinary

Linda Robertson of the Miami Herald, on the sideline antics of college basketball coaches:

“They wear suit jackets when they should be wearing straitjackets.

“They preen and pout like Mick Jagger. They hop and stomp along the sideline like some kind of molecule gone mad.

“They yell and gesticulate like a preacher the night before judgment day.”

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Trivia time: Other than 1958, when did Oregon play in the Rose Bowl game?

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Seattle fog: Gary Payton on the struggling Seattle SuperSonics, who won an NBA-leading 63 games last season:

“We ain’t doing nothing. We ain’t playing the way we’re supposed to be playing. Right now we don’t know what’s going on.”

Hey, Gary, try to find out.

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That’s all folks: Dan Barriero in the Star Tribune of Minneapolis on George Foreman: “He may be more cartoon character than anything else these days, but that’s all boxing is anyway--a pay-per-view cartoon.”

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Come again? Butch Beard, New Jersey Net coach, on rookie center Yinka Dare:

“You’re never as good as you look and as bad as you look. As bad as you may think he is, he’s not that bad. OK?”

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Twilight zone: Bill Curry, Kentucky football coach, on his team’s 1-10 season: “Rod Serling and Stephen King put this one together for us.”

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Add Curry: Pepper Rodgers, former UCLA and Georgia Tech football coach, in the Sporting News on Curry: “Bill has a Pollyanna way about him. He talks about all the things people basically want to hear, but you can’t deflect your won-lost record forever.”

Rodgers hired Curry as an assistant at Georgia Tech in 1976, then lost his job to him in 1980.

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Defensive strategy: Dan Shaughnessy in the Boston Globe: “Dallas safety James Washington wielded a photographer’s tripod in the middle of Monday night’s (Nov. 7) scuffle with the Giants.

“Reminded us of little Sam Jones (Boston Celtics) picking up a photographer’s stool to hold off Wilt Chamberlain all those years ago.”

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Looking back: On this day in 1950, the Ft. Wayne Pistons defeated the Minneapolis Lakers, 19-18, in the lowest-scoring game in NBA history. George Mikan had 15 of the Lakers’ 18 points.

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Transition: Norman Chad in the Chicago Sun-Times on the Houston Oilers’ floundering offense: “The Astrodome, formerly known as the House of Pain, has been renamed the House of No Gain.”

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Trivia answer: Oregon beat Pennsylvania, 14-0, in 1917, and lost to Harvard, 7-6, in 1920.

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Quotebook: Detroit Lion Coach Wayne Fontes on running back Barry Sanders: “Right now, he’s the best runner that’s ever touched the football. If anyone thinks he isn’t, then they’re not watching football.”