Opening night shatters: A synopsis of the...

Opening night shatters: A synopsis of the play “Two & Two Makes Sex” says that when “50-something George” has an affair with a younger woman, his wife plots revenge “with unpredictable and hilarious results.”

But what was really unpredictable about opening night at the La Mirada Theater was that Ric Watson, who was playing George, suffered a broken leg during the first act.

“It’s a scene where he’s supposed to jog out the door,” said producer Yolanda Robinson. “Only he hopped off the stage on one leg. It probably looked like it was part of the show because he’s sort of a bumbling guy.”

An ambulance was summoned for Watson, who previously had broken the same leg. And the curtain was brought down.

The next day, Robinson found a replacement in Neal Fugate, who received good reviews from the audience even though he carried the script during his first performance. (The show closes Sunday.)

Producer Robinson still can’t get over Watson’s mishap. “We said, ‘Break a leg,”’ she said, “and 30 minutes later he did.”

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Sour message?Jeff Bliss found a sign that seemed to advertise obnoxious oranges in the Ventura County town of Fillmore (see photo). Or were they wild belly dancers?

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Congratulations, Johnnie!The L.A. Downtown News asked six passersby, “Who would make a better used car salesperson: Johnnie Cochran or Marcia Clark?” Cochran won, 3-2. One person cast no vote because, he explained, “I don’t think there is a lawyer I trust enough to buy a used car from.” The speaker was himself a lawyer, by the way.

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Nick at Nite’s new competitor: KCOP (Channel 13), which airs a half-hour segment on the Simpson trial nightly at 10:30, calls the program, “O.J. Tonight.”

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While the fans are throwing out the insults . . . : If replacement players are wearing Dodger Blue when baseball season begins at Chavez Ravine, an appropriate personality should be found to throw out the first ball. But who?

We might nominate former Supervisor Pete Schabarum, the leader of the term limits movement, which has filled the state Legislature with many replacement officeholders.

But we’ll leave it up to you, the readers.

Please send us your nominees by mail (not fax or telephone) to: Only in L.A., L.A. Times, Times Mirror Square, L.A. 90053.

Those with the most creative suggestions will be eligible to receive a tacky prize from Only in L.A.’s Cave of Wonders, which holds such treasures as a “Thank You for Keeping Your Pet on a Leash” T-shirt, a 1995 “Super-Scooper” Airplane calendar and a baby bottle shaped like a Dr. Pepper bottle.

Offer not good in state of Nebraska. (We don’t know why--but we’ve noticed that other contests always make that declaration, so we’ll make it too.)

miscelLAny Publicist/copywriter Saul Kahan ) notes that members of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences will be shown a blistering twin bill of Oscar nominees next Wednesday. The films, both foreign-made, are: “Red” and “Burnt by the Sun.”