Parents Wrong for Challenging Rules

* Your recent reports involving students who feel “wronged”--the autistic young man whose speech was not chosen for graduation ceremonies and the group of young men who will not be allowed to graduate with their class because they attacked a student on campus--have an important fact in common. In both cases, parents are supporting their children and challenging the rules.

Certainly, there are times when we all question rules and regulations. There are instances when we must look at individuals and consider the circumstances before applying those rules. However, when the students understand what is required and choose to do something else, whatever that may be, parents who are wise will side with the rules. When parents challenge authorities because they only see their child’s hurt or rejection, the lesson they teach is very clear: If you don’t like how you’ve been treated, kick, yell and scream “unfair” until the boss gives in.

The school districts are right to insist that all student behavior must be appropriate. How else can they keep safe campuses? Parents of the disabled (and I am such a parent) need to realize their children are entitled to “free and equal” education, not special treatment. To insist on “special” separates their children from their classmates even more.

What these parents must say to their children is, “I’m sorry you didn’t get your way but rules are important. Without them society would fall apart and everyone’s freedoms would disappear.”

MARY ROSS

Thousand Oaks