Chivalry Is . . . Well, Whimpering

Cigars are back--could gentlemen be far behind?

Maybe so.

Just last week we were at the opening of the Grand Havana Room in Beverly Hills, where charter members the likes of Arnold Schwarzenegger, Robert DeNiro and Tony Danza have paid $2,000 to have their names in bronze on their very own personal humidors.

While fumbling through our purse for a mere cigarette, we wondered whether the nerdy development boy in the denim shirt and granny glasses standing next to us would offer to share his match.

He did so, at the last minute--and then promptly extinguished it in our drink.

Oh well, it’s not that we mind the return of the cad.

We just want him to dress better.

Underage Blues: She may be on every magazine cover, but she’s not at the Lava Lounge.

When underage Drew Barrymore arrived with a fake Washington State driver’s license, the doorman stopped her.

She proceeded to explain that she deserved to be let in because she’s been around the world and has tremendous life experience.

The doorman was unmoved, and Miss B. stomped off in a huff--perhaps to party on at the nearest Chuck E. Cheese?

What a Kick: Lately we’ve seen tousled hair, smudgy eyeliner and all manner of baby-doll sleep wear, but watch for a new take on the just-rolled-out-of-bed look: mismatched shoes.

In “Desperado,” opening this week, Salma Hayuk is rousted out of a steamy tryst with Antonio Banderas by a couple of bad guys carrying machine guns.

She spends the rest of the movie clattering from rooftop to rooftop wearing one black stiletto and one red one.

(For an extra-sexy swagger, Hayuk seems to be traipsing along with one heel slightly higher than the other.)

How long can it be before some shoe store on Melrose starts selling mix ‘n’ match pairs to second-wave trendsetters?

--COMPILED BY THE SOCIAL CLIMES STAFF