A Taste of Korean Heritage for Parents, Adopted Children

Suzanne Buchanan is a newcomer to the world of cross-cultural adoptions. She and her husband adopted a Korean baby only last spring. With James Hyun Soo Buchanan about to turn 1, the couple wanted to celebrate their son’s birthday with some of the customs of his homeland.

So on Saturday, the Buchanan family joined the hundreds of guests jammed into the Bethel Korean Church in Irvine for a dose of Korean tradition tailored for Americans who have adopted Korean children.

They sampled rice cakes and applauded young martial arts performers. They learned about such customs as first-birthday ceremonies and New Year’s Day rituals.

And they met other parents like themselves--mostly white, many puzzling over how best to raise a Korean-born child in Southern California.

It was to help these parents and promote understanding of Korean culture that the Bethel Korean Church decided to organize its first Korean Cultural Day, a potpourri of music, dance, exhibits and food. The event drew more than 70 families.

“It was a surprise for us. We didn’t expect this many,” said Dongcheon Kim, adoption ministry director at the 3,000-member Christian church, one of the largest Korean churches in the Los Angeles metropolitan area.

“What I’m hearing from the families is that they were waiting for this opportunity for their children to learn about Korean culture,” he said.

So the parents came to learn, some accompanied by their Korean-born teenagers, some toting infants less than a year old.

They were welcomed warmly by church members, including some women wearing bright fuchsia-colored traditional gowns. After a standing-room-only program of talks, dance and music in the church, they gathered for a dinner of traditional Korean food cooked by congregation members.

Children were given traditional luck bags and bunches of balloons. Even the written program was a learning tool, explaining how to pronounce “hello” and “thank you” in Korean and giving examples of Korean sokdam, or proverbs.

Church members said they hoped the program would not only provide a sampling of Korean culture but also establish ties between the church and the visiting parents.

Several parents said they felt impelled to learn more about Korea for their children’s sake.

“We’re just learning,” explained Buchanan, of Riverside, as she sat with her family eating from plates brimming with Korean food.

Already, she has become used to strangers asking whether she is baby-sitting little James--especially when they see her two blond-haired daughters, ages 6 and 4. She doesn’t want him to think of adoption as negative; nor does she want him to lose his ties to Korea. So she is reading books, planning a birthday party, thinking of sending her son to Korean language school.

Bob and Katharyn Molinaro of Newport Beach have enrolled their two daughters in language school--both 7-year-old K.T., whom they adopted as a baby, and 9-year-old Amanda, who was the only white student in the class. Amanda now has her own Korean name, and the two won applause with their brief speech Saturday delivered in Korean and English.

“We figured that if both kids were together, it would be easier for them,” said Bob Molinaro. And learning Korean can imbue self-confidence in an adopted Korean child, Molinaro said. “It lets the child have a comfort level, because they can interact with children like them.” Now, Bob and Katharyn Molinaro hope to learn Korean themselves.

Mike and Margot Strawn of Lake Forest have taken their two adopted daughters to Korean street fairs, but they had never before attended a cultural fair like the one Saturday.

“I would hope this helps us break down some cultural barriers,” Mike Strawn said.

Kathy Russel of San Pedro, who with her husband adopted a 5-year-old Korean boy this fall, was busy collecting recipes for such dishes as mung bean pancakes.

She said she does not want her son growing up divorced from Korean culture.

“If they took away your child and took him to live in Korea, would you want them to change his name?” she said.

“It’s so much a part of him. We want him to have that pride, that knowledge.”