“Hansel and Gretel” meets “Cops”:Some heavy metal...

“Hansel and Gretel” meets “Cops”:

Some heavy metal parts were stolen from a Paramount aerospace contractor, and the bad guys seemed to make a clean getaway.

Then, a civilian officer “noticed very faint shopping cart tracks on the sidewalk” outside the building, reports the Paramount publication, City Talk.

The officer “followed the tracks, which ended at a nearby house. She called for [L.A. County Sheriff’s Department] deputies, who went to the house and found the stolen metal parts.”

As simple as following bread crumbs.

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YOU CAN DOWNSHIFT AND DOWNLOAD AT THE SAME TIME! Just when we thought that traffic couldn’t get more hazardous on the roadways, a colleague of ours noticed an ad for a new car accessory. The problem is, how can you simultaneously drive and type on a laptop computer when you have to make that important call on your cellular phone?

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LIST OF THE DAY: Some of the offbeat messages over the years on the marquee of Arthur’s, a little coffee shop in Downey.

* “Banquet Facilities for Six or Less”

* “Thank You for Not Dieting”

* “Gringo Spoken Here”

* “Thank you, Gourmet Magazine”

And, most recently:

* “Rooftop Helicopter Park. One Only.”

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SIGALERTS HAS A NICE RING, THOUGH: Those of you who are trying to figure out what the Seattle Seahawks should be called down here, take note. Rancho Cucamonga’s professional baseball team already has the trademark rights to the name Quakes.

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FANTASY HAS ITS LIMITS: “Sudden Death” is a rather improbable Jean-Claude Van Damme movie about the kidnapping of the vice president of the United States while the latter is attending the Stanley Cup hockey finals. No, it isn’t set at the Forum, but at Pittsburgh’s Civic Arena. And, no, the L.A. Kings aren’t one of the two teams in the finals. We said the movie’s improbable, not delusional.

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A SUPPORTER OF NONE OF THE ABOVE: Paul Schowalter of La Habra Heights found a sign on a telephone pole that might have widespread appeal in this election year. The author of the sign is apparently against everything.

Schowalter, in a postscript, mentions that a recent news item “really put my life into perspective: Michael Jackson’s marriage lasted longer than mine! Aaaah! If that’s not enough to make me carry around my own ‘No’ sign. . . .”

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PRESENT AT THE BIRTH OF A TV SHOW--IT ISN’T PRETTY: George Kiseda reports that he was in “an overpriced Beverly Hills restaurant” when he overheard two show biz types at the next table.

“The younger of the two diners was pitching an idea for a TV show to a guy who apparently had the cachet (and the cash) to put it on the air,” Kiseda said. “The pitcher said it was a shame that TV was offering so much trash. It was demeaning to viewers, he said. The older guy wondered who the idea man had in mind as guests. For starters, the idea man said, there’s the woman who says she had sex with 251 men in 10 hours. . . .”

miscelLAny:

Albert Rowuin of La Puente saw a Broadway department store ad for the board game College Opoly ($24.98), in which players “can buy campus properties, collect credit hours and trade them for diplomas from UCLA, USC, Arizona and more. . . .” Don’t some college athletes already do that?

Ad for new car accessory: Beating boredom on the freeway.