Laugh Lines
* The government says the nation is healthier than ever, with life expectancy up. “The good news is you might live to be 76,” says Paul Ecker. “The bad news is you will still be stuck in traffic on Hollywood Boulevard due to MTA construction.”
* “In Seattle, Bill Gates and his family have moved into their new 40,000-square-foot mansion on Lake Washington. It has a theater, a video arcade, a 100-seat reception hall. . . . No expense was spared. For instance, the pool’s lifeguard is David Hasselhoff.” (Bob Mills)
* “According to a new study, Americans now spend 94% of their time indoors,” says the Cutler Daily Scoop. “Whaddaya expect from a culture that will go inside a gym to use a walking machine?”
* SEND US A LINE: Got a joke? Send it to Laugh Lines, a syndicated feature, by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Life & Style, The Times, Times Mirror Square, Los Angeles, CA 90053.
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