Santa May Raise Some Holiday Spirits

Writer Art Vinsel read where Santa Claus will meet with kiddies next Friday in an unusual setting: the Green Hills Memorial Park and Mortuary in Rancho Palos Verdes.

“It’s one of many community events we hold,” a mortuary spokesman explained. Still, as Vinsel observed, Santa should remember one thing: Don’t use any chimneys there.

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WHICH REMINDS US OF THE BATES MOTEL: The mention here of “Psycho” brought a note from Peter Apanel, who spotted a real-live (so to speak) Bates Motel outside of Fairfield, Iowa. “I stopped in [but didn’t stay overnight] to get a postcard,” Apanel says.

The proprietor told him that director Alfred Hitchcock actually spent a night there prior to making the 1960 movie “and had been inspired” enough to copy it for the horror flick. (Apanel didn’t say what “inspired” Hitchcock, and I didn’t ask.)

Years later, Apanel asked “Psycho” shower victim Janet Leigh to sign the card at Vroman’s Bookstore in Pasadena in connection with the publishing of her autobiography.

Leigh was not at a loss for words. “This looks a little better than the other one,” the actress wrote.

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SMASH ‘EM, POETS (CONT.): After the discussion here about teams with nonthreatening names, a Rosanna Martinez chastised me for omitting the Banana Slugs of UC Santa Cruz. Pepperdine spokesman Jeff Bliss spoke up for the Pepperdine Waves (though the waves can get a bit wild along the coast).

And, finally, Rich Roberts nostalgically recalled the peaceful L.A. Lambs (sometimes called the Rams).

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TALK ABOUT CRAMPED SCHOOL CONDITIONS: Barbara Beaton noticed an announcement in an L.A. County school that seems to have a new means of keeping students in their place (see accompanying).

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COFFEE OR FASHION STATEMENT? That was the question asked by Steve Durgin of North Hollywood after seeing a sign advertising “cappuchinos” (see photo).

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DUH! AWARD WINNER: George Price of Moreno Valley bought a waterproof camera, with directions that included a very basic rule about submerging oneself (see accompanying).

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A STUDENT WHO CHEWS UP SHOES? A piece of junk mail from a Texas company to “The Parents of Cookie Benitez” revealed that Cookie might be eligible for some financial aid, adding “this is not to promote the sale of life insurance, investments, books or other materials.”

Some of the Benitez family’s answers on the enclosed questionnaire were surprising, though truthful:

--Parent Name: “Who knows? Found him in the street.”

--Scholastic Awards and Achievements: “Can sit on order.” Then, again, as Evelyn Benitez explained: “Cookie is my 11-year-old terrier.”

miscelLAny:

One of the conservation-themed ads used by the L.A. County Department of Public Works is titled: “How to Hold Your Water Longer.”

Steve Harvey can be reached by phone at (213) 237-7083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com and by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, Times Mirror Square L.A. 90053.