Angry TV Host’s a Repeat Visitor

Dear Cynthia: I have had this dream five or six times. I am the invited guest on a talk show. I immediately say something off the topic, about freeing people the government has locked up. The host is furious with me and cuts off my microphone.

I then see myself as a mature woman (I am a man) standing in the driveway of my childhood home. The TV host is dangling from the sky, about three feet off the ground. He has a devilish, mean and angry expression. I understand that his holding the microphone prevents me from speaking.

Someone drives by, and all I can do is mouth an epithet. I want the occupants of the car to know that the host is not a nice person. A second car drives up, behind the host. Bad guys get out, and they are obviously coming for me.

Any insights?

ROB HELLER

Los Angeles

Dear Reader: Have you ever been inappropriately off-the-subject during a presentation? Do you let your political concerns negatively affect your career?

Your boyhood home represents your foundation, attitudes developed in childhood that shape your current outlook and values. By becoming a mature woman, you embody concern and nurturing, but are also less equipped to protect yourself. The authority figure appears (three feet off the ground, “above” the rest of us), and you have some concern that if you tell people he’s a bad guy, you will get roughed up.

But often in life, unethical people end up the source of their own undoing. You don’t need to be responsible for alerting others to them. You have deep convictions about right and wrong, but you may want to be more selective about where and when you take up the cause. Pick your fights.

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Dear Cynthia: I have been separated for nine years and just recently was divorced. Ever since the separation, I have had the same girlfriend. I still see my ex-wife about once a week. We have two daughters and a grandchild, and have maintained a good friendship.

In my dream, I was at my girlfriend’s house and my ex-wife came over to visit me. My ex was ready to leave, and I hugged her goodbye. My girlfriend said, “Go with her. You two belong together.” I was confused and refused at first, but finally gave in and left with my ex.

Next, I was standing on a hangman’s gallows with a noose around my neck. I had a sense that my girlfriend was doing the hanging, but I am not sure. Just before I was to drop, my ex was in the same noose as I was.

HENRY

Via Internet

Dear Henry: It’s time to have a heart-to-heart with your girlfriend if you value her and want her to remain in your life. Your dream is a strong warning that you’ll find your head in a noose (figuratively speaking, of course) unless you do something soon.

It is commendable that you and your ex have maintained a healthy relationship. But your dream indicates that you are feeling tested by your girlfriend. Obviously, you can’t take what she says at face value: She tells you to go with your ex and then hangs you for it!

The finalization of your divorce has changed the dynamic of your relationship with your girlfriend (in the dream, your trouble starts when you hug your ex-wife goodbye). It is time now to find new ways of sharing time with your girlfriend. Reinforce the ways she is special to you.

Behavioral therapist Cynthia Richmond’s column appears every other Monday. To contact her, write to In Your Dreams, Southern California Living, Los Angeles Times, Times Mirror Square, Los Angeles, CA 90053; send a fax to (213) 237-0732; or e-mail her at cynthrich@aol.com Please include your hometown and a daytime phone number. Letters should be no longer than 100 words and cannot be returned.

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Cynthia Richmond explains children’s dreams on our Kids’ Reading Room page every Wednesday.