A 2nd Anniversary Celebration With Some Great Friends

This column turns 2 years old this week, and I wanted to say something dramatic to mark the occasion. But I keep thinking about an e-mail sent to me a few months ago from my wife’s brother-in-law in Minneapolis.

He had stumbled across the column on the Internet and mused: “How did you get such a cushy job?”

My sentiments too. It’s been all pleasure to meet so many extraordinary people in Orange County these last two years. A few thoughts about some of them. . . .

During my first week as a columnist, I wrote about Rose Carriker of Orange. At 83, she’d been volunteering her time for 17 years to serve hot meals to the elderly, many younger than she. Carriker is now 85, and still driving.

I’ll always remember the 90-year-old woman who told me when I rode with Carriker one day: “Rose preserves us.”

Carriker told me this week that she’ll continue to serve meals as long as she’s healthy--and her Mercedes-Benz holds out. She’s closing in on 200,000 miles on it. . . .

I loved meeting the Diener family, who made a home of their boat moored in Newport Harbor. Scott Diener left his job as an associate dean at Chapman University and Kelley Diener gave up her elementary school teaching job so they could take their 14-year-old son Brett on a 5-year sailing trip around the world.

Scott Diener recently wrote to friends from the first leg of the trip, off the Mexican Coast: “I’d forgotten how nice it is to be around so many friendly people. No pretense, no power trips.”

I had asked the Dieners if they worried about getting along as a family on such a challenging odyssey. Scott Diener’s letter touched on that subject: “We have come through family fights with a bit of sanity. Cruising is hard in some ways, particularly on relationships. Kindness, thoughtfulness and courtesy become really important facets of everyday life.” . . .

In November of 1996 I wrote a column about the 18th anniversary of the death of Richard Steed, the only San Clemente police officer ever killed in the line of duty. The week it ran, I had watched dozens of enthusiastic youngsters enjoying softball at Steed Park, named by the city in his honor.

Sadly, the park is now closed, a victim of city budget constraints. . . .

Some people I’ve met will always be special. Like Marguerite Beal, the recreational therapist at Children’s Hospital of Orange County who refused to give up on a dying baby--and later became her mother. Marguerite and daughter Gracie, now 9, are thriving. I tell their story each time I speak in public, and I’ve yet to get through it without a cracking voice. . . .

Then there was Frank Bierman of San Juan Capistrano, who had called me while I was on a tight deadline about some obscure disease. He just wanted to educate others about it, he said. His wife had died of the illness; he had buried her the day before.

It takes a Frank Bierman sometimes to remind you that some things are more important than deadlines. . . .

Written responses to the column generally have been most kind. But even critical letters can be fun. Perhaps the harshest letter came from a former English teacher greatly unhappy that I had misused “lay” for “lie.” I’m just thankful she missed the day I inadvertently split an infinitive. (I don’t want to leave the impression her letter wasn’t appreciated. I’ve worked like crazy on “lay” and “lie” since then.)

I did hear from a couple of bigots upset that I’d chosen a Latino couple who did not speak English for my Valentine’s column last year. I’ve learned that bigots never sign their names or leave return addresses.

Many letters stand out as endearing. One came by fax from a woman who said: “I’ve only got a minute to send this off, but someone needs to tell you: You need a better picture with your column.” I had a new one taken soon after that.

As a follow up: A few weeks ago, by sheer happenstance, I ran into the woman who’d sent that note. She was a little embarrassed, fearful she had offended me. I was happy for the chance to thank her.

One day for retrospection is enough. It’s Valentine’s week and once again I’ll have the pleasure of sharing with readers another remarkable Orange County love story. I know. A cushy job.

Wrap-Up: Then there was the possum column.

It was actually a very positive piece about possums living among us in urban Orange County and all the good they do. The possum is our friend, the experts agree. But I did say I thought possums were ugly, and that I was tired of them living in my backyard.

One reader immediately sent me a picture of a possum. And this possum was holding up my picture. The caption read: “Look who’s calling who ugly.”

I keep that picture posted in my office, to remind me we should be sensitive as to how our words affect others. Even possums have feelings.

Jerry Hicks’ column appears Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. Readers may reach Hicks by calling the Times Orange County Edition at (714) 966-7823 or by fax to (714) 966-7711, or e-mail to jerry.hicks@latimes.com