Around the NFL: TV, Madden and Switzer

Be it resolved:

Whereas, in light of the recent $17.6-billion bonanza TV deal received by the NFL, any politician, sportswriter, developer, investor, mogul, NFL spokesperson, insider, owner, unnamed source or any other person presumably of sound mind, who even so much as suggests that one red cent of public money be provided to subsidize a professional sports venue, that person shall be sentenced without hearing or trial to a mandatory minimum 500 hours community service at an inner-city school’s remedial education classroom, an admitting room in a public hospital’s trauma unit or any similar facility purportedly providing health care and/or educational services to the people of the lower levels of society.

PAUL DWYER

Santa Monica

*

Upon reading in this morning’s sports section that CBS has regained the rights to televise the NFL, I was overcome by a feeling of dread. It can be summed up in two words:

Brent Musburger!!!

PHIL WICKEY

Long Beach

*

John Madden’s time has come and gone as an announcer. Most football fans are not idiots and don’t need the obvious stated ad nauseam. I now know why the “Madden Uttering Tripe for Eternity” button or MUTE was invented.

BOB FRITCH

Atascadero

*

With the NFC having won 13 consecutive Super Bowls, the only suspense left in this year’s game is finding out which poor sap will win the MVP and its accompanying sentence--signing with the Raiders during the off-season.

NICK ROSE

Newport Beach

*

It will forever be known as “Black Friday”: the day Barry Switzer resigned, leaving The Times’ sportswriters without their favorite whipping boy.

Slow news day? Bash Barry. Busy news day? There’s always room from some juicy Barry bit.

My deepest sympathies to Simers, Plaschke, and the worst culprit, Mal Florence. I know it must be difficult for you to face the future without Barry Switzer to kick around anymore. But perhaps without the Switzer crutch, you’ll be forced to start behaving like real sports reporters instead of gossip mongers and feeble humorists.

LAWRENCE GARRISON

Playa del Rey