A Vacation at Camp L.A.

Two tourists from Germany arrived at Le Parc Suites Hotel in West Hollywood, loaded down with camping gear. They thought “their travel agent had booked them at a park site in L.A., not Le Parc,” explained Michelle Bolton, a hotel spokesman. The visitors checked their gear at the front desk and stayed anyway, satisfied to watch the wildlife that gathered around the rooftop swimming pool.

THEN THERE’S LE PARKING: If you’re like me, you become easily frustrated over how difficult it is to find a place to dock your chariot these days. Especially with so many elitist operations closed to the public (see photos). A while back Paul Cate sent along an example of a lot in the South Bay that seems to cater only to world leaders (or at least Elk leaders). Ellen Meehan of San Gabriel found a location where you’re seemingly out of luck unless you have a very high military rank. And your columnist noticed another lot in Long Beach where you must be a celebrity (or willing to eat Famous Hamburgers).

L.A. INSULT OF THE DAY: A freeway billboard in the South Bay area proclaims, “A day in San Diego is like a week out of L.A.”

Camping gear optional.

ORDER IN THE VIRTUAL COURT! In the new “Ask the Judge” feature on the L.A. County Superior Court’s World Wide Web site, Judge Gregory O’Brien takes questions sent by schoolkids.

Frequent queries center on whether he was a good student (“Pretty good, but not outstanding. Top 10%”), whether he has had any celebrity cases (a lawsuit involving the late Tupac Shakur was settled before trial), and the number of people he has sent to jail (“thousands”).

Naturally, one youngster had to ask O’Brien the all-important question of whether he’s recognized while “shopping in the malls.”

O’Brien responded: “Every now and then someone will recognize me. . . . A waiter, who gave me exceptional service in a restaurant one evening, pulled me aside after dinner and thanked me for having sent him to jail for drunk driving. ‘You saved my life,’ he said.”

DUELING DISHES: In naming Sushi of Naples to my Hall of Fame of local cross-cultural eateries, I omitted mentioning another member, the Vikings Table Smorgasbord in West L.A., as Justin Leavens reminded me. The Vikings Table is, of course, a Chinese restaurant. Guess I could have also thrown in the Westwood eatery known as Tandoor Indian Food & Stan’s Donuts.

QUESTION OF THE DAY: “Why,” asks a tobacco company’s billboard on the Long Beach Freeway, “do politicians smoke cigars while taxing cigarettes?”

Hmm. Can’t remember Barbara Boxer and Dianne Feinstein, California’s two U.S. senators, puffing on stogies.

WHICH REMINDS ME: Les Woodson of San Pedro is amused by the Winston cigarette ads that say, “No bull,” coming as they do during the controversy over additives in cigarettes. “Does that mean,” Woodson asks “that they no longer have cow manure in them?”

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The winning entry in the recent Big Dog Parade, held in Santa Barbara, was a dachshund clad in a hot dog bun costume, accompanied by his owners, who were dressed as a jar of mustard, a bottle of catsup and a bag of French fries. Fine, but where was the soft drink?

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Steve Harvey can be reached by phone at (213) 237-7083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com and by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, Times Mirror Square, L.A. 90053.