Marriage for Gays

* Re “Measure to Ban Gay Marriages OKd for Ballot,” Nov. 18: We are writing to help people understand one gay couple’s position on gay marriage. We don’t need any additional government sanction or approval for us to be married to each other anywhere in the U.S.; we are already legally married here in California, and, if we did the same thing elsewhere, we could do it legally in all 50 states. Here’s how this is possible: We own our home jointly; joint banking; power of attorney financially and medically over each other; joint ownership of vehicles; both wills have each other as beneficiaries, including our insurance policies; jointly owned investments; and joint legal custody of our six children.

As you can see, we are legally married to each other in every important way, with many benefits, and possible domestic partner health benefits coming in the future. Any other identified marriage benefits, excluding taxes, are usually social, and not very important to us. We were married in a religious ceremony and our families embrace us. What more do we need? True, we had to do more paperwork to become married, but most of it is free, and it is just as binding as a marriage certificate.

Don’t let religious fervor from hatemongers get you too excited about how to vote about gay marriage. This is only part of a continued attempt to further demonize gay people and their relationships. We personally are going to vote yes on the gay marriage ban initiative in March 2000.

LORI HOLT-SANCHEZ

RUTH SANCHEZ-HOLT

Highland