Gray Hair Shouldn’t Make You Wig Out
Dear Fashion Police: My hair is naturally silver, and it’s never been colored. It started changing before I turned 30. I’ve always liked gray hair, but I cheerfully admit that sometimes I resent remarks from others who do color their hair and pretend they are years younger than they are.
No way do I want to start coloring my hair. My question is, if I buy a wig, what color would I look for? My hair was dark brown with a lot of red in it--sort of auburn. I wear it in a pageboy style. Each time I mention the wig to my hairdresser he goes through the roof saying, “No! No! No!”
Do you have any ideas--even if it’s to do nothing?
--GETTIN’ WIGGY WITH IT
Dear Wiggy: We agree with your hairdresser. A wig is a bad idea. If you don’t wear it consistently, how are you going to explain the discrepancy in your hair color from day to day? And if you do wear it every day, can you imagine how horribly uncomfortable it’s going to be, especially in summer when your head feels like it’s melting into a big blob of wig-covered brain goo?
If there’s a teeny tiny chance of us changing your mind, we vote for color. This isn’t an ageist thing. Gray hair tends to give skin an unattractive pallor. But you don’t have to go from all-gray to all-brown and watch that band of serious roots coming in between touch-ups.
Hair stylist Michael Macahilig of Umberto, Camden in Beverly Hills suggests weaving lowlights into your hair. Lowlights--the opposite of highlights--are strands of darker shades woven throughout the gray.
“If your hair is 75% to 100% gray,” he says, “I would start with putting in one shade lighter than your natural color--before you went gray--so when it fades it doesn’t look hard. I’d probably do a couple of shades, maybe half a shade lighter or darker than the first, and the combination would make it look natural. For instance, if you were a dark auburn, I’d start with a medium auburn and mix a darker shade in. That way the colors stay within the same family. Also, I’d use a low-volume peroxide color, which will keep it from fading.”
With this method, Macahilig says your roots won’t need touching up for six to 10 weeks.
If you do decide to color your hair (please, oh, please, consider it), you may have to rethink your makeup. If you’re not sure what will go with your new look, get some advice at a makeup counter or splurge on a make-over. It’ll be worth it.
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Dear Fashion Police: Recently I was horrified to discover that the director of my department has issued a policy that the men in our office should not wear ties, unless they have a meeting with people outside. Despite his high salary, our director is one of those men who wears drip-dry shirts (sometimes even short-sleeved), cheap ties, and let’s not even discuss the shoes. That’s bad enough, but now he doesn’t want the other men to dress professionally either. He suggested that they keep a few ties in a drawer or briefcase and a blazer in the office. Yet, he does not want casual--polo shirts are not allowed, for instance. Aren’t ties required with suits? Some of the guys wear beautiful ties, which, frankly, I’ll miss. Those men who wear suits without ties are left feeling naked and stupid. But not following this directive is seen as not being a team player.
As much as I would like to bring this matter up with him directly, I can’t. Please assist me and inform this man in the error of his ways! What’s next? No pantyhose and no heels for women?
--PANTIES
IN A KNOT
Dear In A Knot: Hold on, now. Let’s not rake this poor soul over the proverbial coals, even if he is Mr. Polyester Short-Sleeve Shirt Man.
It sounds as if your boss’ attempts at instilling a relaxed-dress policy in the office may need a little honing. A no-tie edict isn’t that horrendous--many offices are adopting less stringent dress codes, especially if employees don’t have to deal with the public or clients every day.
Besides, ask some men whether they like wearing suits and ties every day. No doubt many, if not most, will say no. Most women have the same negative feelings about pantyhose and heels, despite your opinions otherwise.
Let’s face it--the world is becoming more casual, and there’s little you or I can do about it. Frankly, we see nothing wrong with relaxing the rules a little--if there are clear policies about what should and should not be worn to the office so that employees still look neat and professional.
But it’s difficult to determine whether those guidelines have been put in place at your office, since you only allude to a no-polo-shirts policy, but then mention that men are wearing both suits and blazers sans ties.
If the rules are fuzzy, the Big Guy needs to get with the program, especially since he doesn’t seem to have a similar code about women’s clothes. But you’re right--it’s not for you to say what the men should or shouldn’t wear. If your male co-workers are upset or confused about the new rules, they should see about putting a policy in writing--with staff input. That’s the democratic way.
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