ON THE MEND

He sits in the middle of the Florida Marlins’ clubhouse, a flashback in the flesh, his dark goatee framing that familiar cocky grin.

1998 was the lousiest year of his life, but he can smile because he survived the slaughter. Sheffield, Bonilla, Leiter, Brown, Conine, Nen, Renteria, Johnson, White--they’re all gone.

Alex Fernandez is back.

“I want to be a part of this team so bad,” he says.

Fernandez is not just a member of the Marlins but their ace, even though he hasn’t pitched since October 1997. A torn rotator cuff sent him to the sideline during the National League championship series, and he watched as his team became the World Series champion and then a laughingstock that lost 108 games last year.

Now that the Marlins have been gutted, they’re trying to rebuild with promising but unproven youngsters. Fernandez, 29, finds himself surrounded by strangers in the clubhouse, but he likes the new direction, the new owner, the new manager, even the new spring training caps.

A Cuban American who grew up in Miami, Fernandez plans to start the season opener and many games after that for his hometown team. He has three seasons remaining on a $7 million-a-year contract.

“I’m young enough that I can see this team being built and see myself being a big part of it,” he says. “I’ll get used to these guys quick. They’re young and they’re going to play hard. That’s all you can ask.”

Two questions loom, however, and Fernandez doesn’t know the answers:

* Will he regain his old form?

* If he does, will he be traded?

Had Fernandez been healthy last year, he would now be pitching elsewhere. New owner John Henry called a halt to the payroll purge, and the Marlins say there are no plans to trade Fernandez. They also don’t rule out a deal.

“We’re not interested in trading him, because he’s still young enough that when we get where we want to go, he’s going to be with us,” new manager John Boles says. “Anybody who is in a uniform, a trade possibility always exists. But somebody would really have to knock our socks off.”

Fernandez could attract some tempting offers. In today’s market, a 29-year-old pitcher with a 96-75 career record, postseason experience and a $7 million salary is a bargain--if he’s healthy.

That would also make him a bargain for Florida.

“If he pitches the way he used to pitch,” general manager Dave Dombrowski says, “he brings to the table exactly what the Marlins want--a top-of-the-rotation starter who can give you a lot of innings, who’s a leader, who can match up with the other No. 1 pitchers and take pressure off our other starters.”

Doctors are pleased with Fernandez’s recovery, and he’s encouraged by his spring training results. He joins the other pitchers in throwing sessions, and when he wakes up the next morning, he’s thrilled by how good his shoulder feels.

But there’s no way to know how effective he’ll be this season. He endured a long, arduous rehabilitation that left him wondering about his future.

“I had times I said, ‘If I feel the way I feel, there’s no way I’ll be able to pitch again,”’ he says. “I doubted everything. There was a lot of time-consuming effort, and a lot of pain. The slightest movement, especially after surgery, would hurt. It took a while for me to deal with it.”

The dismantling of the Marlins by former owner Wayne Huizenga hurt even more, Fernandez says.

“Watching my teammates leave one by one was devastating to me personally because we were such good friends. I was upset, mad, angry. But it’s a business. I disagree completely with what they did. But who am I to say something if I’m just an employee here?”

Fernandez’s family is in Miami. So is his new 10-bedroom mansion 15 minutes from Pro Player Stadium. His roots run deeper than any palm tree in town.

“The Marlins know the way I feel,” he says. “They know I want to be a part of this team. But they’re going to do what’s best for them.”

The cocky grin is gone now. Fernandez straddles a painful past and an uncertain future, wondering how this story will end.