The Network Behind the Net

Patrick Ewing’s wife is a member. Cookie, a.k.a. Mrs. Magic Johnson, is a former affiliate. And Carmen Electra, well, she could be the newest recruit as Dennis Rodman’s bride. Members of Behind the Bench, the National Basketball Wives Assn., may not have the same name recognition as their husbands’ organization, the NBA, but this group of players’ wives is out to prove that they won’t settle for second string.

“When you marry a basketball player, all of a sudden you’re in this position where people want to know you because of who you’re married to,” explained Sandra Evans Short, wife of retired Golden State Warrior Purvis Short. “But the wives still have their own identities, and the group is where we can meet people that are all coming from the same place.”

Deborah Williams, wife of New York Nicks veteran Herb Williams, founded Behind the Bench five years ago to give players’ wives a voice on the issues that impact their families and provide them with a support network to better deal with the uncertainty of life in the NBA. Its present roster includes about 100 wives of current and retired professional basketball players. As part of the group, members seek advice from each other on a wide range of topics, such as how to deal with having their husbands on the road all the time. They talk about the instability of life as a free agent, the difficulties of moving to a new team in a new city and how to handle the spotlight.

“Being in the NBA can be a lot like being in the military. You’re constantly moving, uprooting the family and having to start over again,” said Williams. “People have a tendency to think everything is perfect because you live in a nice house, but the real world’s not like that. We have the same problems as everyone else.”

Behind the Bench doesn’t hold any regularly scheduled meetings. Instead, members call one another when they need advice. Board members speak regularly to keep tabs on what’s going on with individual members and put out a quarterly newsletter to address issues of concern. In addition to providing support to one another, Behind the Bench helps many charities. The group has hosted celebrity fashion shows and golf tournaments along with benefits to raise money for nonprofit organizations that primarily help women and children. Last year, the group raised more than $250,000.

“The women in the organization are a highly trained, highly educated group that constantly move around,” said Williams, who owns a clothing apparel business. The charity events give them an opportunity to use their talents and skills while helping others, she added.

Meanwhile, Behind the Bench helps its members help each other. “There are lots of ladies coming into this lifestyle who have no idea how much their lives will change,” says Short. “They have no idea that people will be calling day and night asking for money, asking for help to buy a car and everything else. We can all relate with what they go through.”