LAUGH LINES

She Believes: “There was some confusion surrounding the end of daylight saving time Sunday morning. Cher heard it was time to turn back the clock again, so she drove down to her cosmetic surgeon’s office.” (Jerry Perisho)

Politics, 1999-Style: “Things are getting a little nastier in the Gore and Bradley campaigns. Today, Al Gore said Bradley’s social proposals are too costly. Bill Bradley said Gore shoots free throws like a girl.” (Alex Kaseberg)

Politics, 1999-Style, Part II: “Republican presidential hopefuls held a debate in New Hampshire and criticized the absence of George W. Bush. Actually, Bush was there, but he apparently got held up in the powder room.” (Joshua Sostrin)

Family Ties: “Britain’s Future Foundation is predicting that babies born in the next millennium will enter school at 3, launch their own businesses by 20 and live to be 120. On the downside, they’ll continue living in their parents’ homes the whole time.” (Ira Lawson)

Spell This: “TV producer David E. Kelley is contemplating a spinoff of one of his shows. ‘Praktice Makes Perfekt’ will be a sitcom starring Dan Quayle as a spelling-challenged paralegal.” (Steve Austin)

Got a joke? Send it to Laugh Lines by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Southern California Living, Los Angeles Times, Times Mirror Square, Los Angeles, CA 90053.