As Time Goes By, Maybe He’ll Forget Patriots’ Defeat

Alan Greenberg in the Hartford Courant, on New England Patriot quarterback Drew Bledsoe:

“No matter what the Germans and the war did to them, Bogie and Bergman comforted themselves knowing they’d always have Paris. No matter what the NFL defenses did to them, the Patriots knew they’d always have Drew. . . .

“In their 27-17 loss to the Dolphins Sunday, the Patriots were Sinatra without his voice, Schwarzenegger without his muscles, Tim Wakefield without his knuckleball.”

What Greenberg is trying to tell us is that five of Bledsoe’s passes were intercepted, the most since he was a rookie in 1993.

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Trivia time: Who are the only football All-Americans to play for Louisiana Tech?

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No end in sight: Garth Woolsey of the Toronto Star suggests a title for a book on baseball’s rising payrolls: “Scrutiny of the Bounty.”

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More money: The San Diego Padres are building an expensive new stadium, so will they pass along the increases to the fans?

Larry Lucchino, the team president, says maybe . . . maybe not.

“If you’re going to start paying players $20 million and $30 million a year, it’s going to come out of somewhere,” Lucchino said. “You cannot price baseball out of the market of ordinary, regular families and folks. You cannot have $29 hot dogs and $80 seats. It just ain’t going to work.”

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All downhill now: Bum Phillips, former coach of the Houston Oilers and New Orleans Saints, on his age: “Being 76 is kinda like having a 45-0 lead in the third quarter. I done got ‘em beat. They can’t catch up.”

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Look for it: From comedy writer Jerry Perisho: “By defeating California Saturday, Stanford qualified to face Wisconsin in the Rose Bowl on New Year’s Day.

“It will give new meaning to the term ‘Y2K.’ On Jan. 1, ‘Y2K’ will stand for the 2,000 yards Ron Dayne will gain on the ground.”

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A bit slow: Steve Rosenbloom in the Chicago Tribune: “How’s the voting going for the Atlanta Thrashers’ All-Century team?”

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Retribution: After completing their first season sweep of the San Francisco 49ers since 1980, the St. Louis Rams were ecstatic.

Said defensive tackle D’Marco Farr: “You can take a lot of joy out of pounding them. They’ve been standing on our throats for so long. It’s about time for them to eat a little humble pie from St. Louis. It was their turn. Let them have it.”

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Outraged: Don Kaul of the Chicago Tribune, complaining that cyclist Greg LeMond not only isn’t No. 1 on ESPN’s list of the century’s top athletes, he isn’t even on it:

“The panel obviously was made up of mopes who think golfers and horses are athletes, but bikers aren’t. Not even ‘Comedy Central’ broadcasts jokes that are that funny.”

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Trivia answer: Offensive lineman Willie Roaf in 1992, and wide receiver Troy Edwards in 1998.

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And finally: Raef LaFrentz of the Denver Nuggets on Shaquille O’Neal: “If Shaq hits 80% of his free throws, the rest of the league wouldn’t have a chance. There wouldn’t even be much point to playing the season.”

Shaq, making 39.5%, would settle for 50% at this juncture.