Neighbors Mad at Revitalized Hef
When 73-year-old Hugh Hefner was asked recently whether he took Viagra, he grinned and answered, “Viagra? They wouldn’t be in business without me.”
Perhaps it’s only a coincidence. But, lately, the frisky septuagenarian’s partying at the Playboy mansion has been getting on the neighbors’ nerves.
Some Holmby Hills residents have appealed to Councilman Mike Feuer to push through preferential parking restrictions that would make it more difficult for visitors to park in the area. The issue is slated to go to a council committee. I wonder if any of the council members will feel it necessary to research the matter at the mansion?
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BUILDING YOUR VOCABULARY: When last we met, class, we discussed the golf course sign that had been altered to say, “No Facklapping Here.” It was supposed to say “Backlapping,” which refers to the sharpening of blades on mowers. I’m sure the gardeners at the Playboy mansion know all about facklapping.
Anyway, let’s move on to “Fossicking,” which Dale Van Vlack of Pacific Palisades noticed on a sign in Australia. It refers to searching or prospecting (gold panning in this case).
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LETTER IMPERFECT: Sheila Crain of Hacienda Heights spotted a sign that did not inspire confidence in the product (see photo).
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TACKLING THE RAMS: Can a season ticket-holder sue the Los Angeles Rams--you remember them--for fraud? Yes, the 4th District Court of Appeal in Santa Ana has ruled.
Ex-fan Larry Charpentier said he purchased tickets in 1994 “with the hope of reserving the seat locations in the future to watch a quality team,” the L.A. Daily Journal reported. Instead, the team played miserably that year--then decamped for St. Louis.
The court did question whether Charpentier should have been surprised, pointing out: “The team has, in succession, run out on Cleveland, Los Angeles and now Anaheim. How long life on the Mississippi will suit the owner is anyone’s guess.”
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THE LEGENDARY DUKE NEWTON: The talk of rechristening the 405 as the Johnny Carson Freeway reminded me that a while back, L.A. County Supervisor Mike Antonovich proposed naming Los Angeles International Airport after the late Jimmy Stewart. I checked with Antonovich’s office and learned that the idea has been grounded.
Of course, Antonovich is not the first to fail. A while back, a cruise line attempted unsuccessfully to rename John Wayne Airport in one of its ads (see accompanying).
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ANNALS OF WEIRD CRIMES: The police log in the Los Alamitos News-Enterprise carried this bulletin out of La Palma: “A child was reported screaming all night long and frequently during the day since June or July because he did not want to share his toys.”
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NO POLITICAL MUSCLE? Arnold Schwarzenegger’s announcement that he would not run for political office calls into question the prophecy revealed in the 1993 Sylvester Stallone movie, “Demolition Man.”
The film is set in the year 2032 in the supermegalopolis of San Angeles, which stretches from San Diego to Santa Barbara. It is a society in which touching is forbidden (couples make love by donning special helmets and exchanging electronic waves); cigarettes and gasoline are banned; all restaurants are Taco Bells and, most important of all, there is an Arnold Schwarzenegger Presidential Museum.
Now I’m starting to question the part about the Taco Bells.
miscelLAny:
In choosing the next city to obtain an expansion team, NFL owners were seemingly under the spell of an old Dean Martin recording. The lyrics were: “Going back to Houston, Houston, Houston. . . .” But it’s only a temporary setback. L.A. just needs to start fossicking for another team.
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Steve Harvey can be reached by phone at (800) LATIMES (Ext. 77083), by fax at (213) 237-4712, by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com and by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, Times Mirror Square, L.A. 90053.