LAUGH LINES

Trying to Fit In: “You see some of these protesters [during the National Democratic Convention in Los Angeles] . . . and they’re wearing jungle camouflage. . . . There’s no jungle in L.A. Why are they wearing jungle camouflage? . . . If you want to blend in L.A., shouldn’t the camouflage be like Starbucks cups with screenplays stuck on them?” (Jay Leno)

Party Hearty 101: “Louisiana State University has been named America’s No. 1 party school, according to a survey by the Princeton Review. . . . In fact, the school’s fight song is ’99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall.’ ” (Daily Scoop)

Clear Convictions: “Al Gore cited his personal morality and religious faith as a Southern Baptist. . . . This church doesn’t believe in drinking, dancing or premarital sex. It was founded in 1610 in opposition . . . to the Dallas Cowboys.” (Argus Hamilton)

Crank Up the Music: “They had a fund-raiser for Al Gore recently. . . . I’m not making this up--do you know what group performed? ‘Asleep at the Wheel.’ . . . They’re a very good group, but with Gore’s image, is that really the best group to have?” (Leno)

Got a joke? Send it to Laugh Lines by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Southern California Living, Los Angeles Times, 202 W. 1st St., Los Angeles, 90012.