Cadillac Convoy an Arresting Sight

Paramount’s always-exciting City Talk newsletter reports that a man was allegedly trying to steal a car radio the other day when the owner spotted him. The panicky break-in suspect then jumped into a waiting blue Cadillac, which cruised away.

Funny thing, though. The witness noticed that another waiting Caddie--this one brown--provided an escort for the blue model.

Sheriff’s deputies were soon on the scene, and it didn’t take them long to find a blue/brown Cadillac convoy. Occupants of both cars were arrested on suspicion of committing several area burglaries.

And having too many supervisors out in the field.

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HE MUST STOCK UP ON THE MOUTHWASH: Niel Lynch of Escondido came upon a dentist who apparently specializes in patients with fiery-breath problems (see photo).

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LETTER IMPERFECT: Clifford Dicker of Culver City found a typographical error in the worst possible section of a user’s guide for an electronic typewriter (see accompanying).

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THE NOT-SO-MAGIC NUMBER: One of the little mysteries of life in Southern California is the $271 fine for a carpool lane violation.

Carl Ehrlich writes: “Where does the uneven number come from? I can see $270, $275, $250 or some other round number. But the $1?”

Donn Pearlman, a columnist for Numismatist magazine, theorized after a visit here: “Obviously the fine originally was set in Mexican pesos or Italian lire, then converted to U.S. dollars.”

Actually, the base fine for the offense is $270. The extra dollar is assessed in those counties that have night courts, such as those in these parts.

By the way, I’ve never been able to confirm the rumor that a hearse driver in the carpool lane once tried to get out of the $271 fine by claiming the corpse in the back as the second occupant of the vehicle.

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SOMETHING FISHY ABOUT THIS DRINK: “Instead of liquor in your creme brulee you get an old fisherman?” asked Larry Kantor of Woodland Hills about one “grand mariner” menu item he noticed--but did not try (see accompanying).

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BEGGING HER PARDON: A woman I know met her husband for breakfast at a Long Beach bagel shop. They took separate cars and she arrived first. Lacking change to buy a newspaper, he walked up to her in line and mumbled (in the fashion of longtime husbands), “Do you have a quarter?”

After she gave it to him, he shuffled out in search of a newspaper rack. Meanwhile, one of the workers rushed up to her and whispered: “Was he asking you for money?”

“Yes,” the woman said.

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” the worker said. “I’ll go talk with him.”

“Well, he’s my husband,” said the woman, who is my wife.

That was the day I decided to have my beard trimmed. The ancient mariner look has its drawbacks.

miscelLAny:

Phil Jackson, coach of the world champion Lakers, is known for his Zen philosophy. Maybe it’ll spread to other sports as well--especially in open-minded L.A. In a Westside newspaper, Paula Van Gelder saw an ad placed by an instructor who teaches a “Zen approach to swimming,” where he “introduces a new relationship with water . . . “

I think it’s fine for the Zen swimmer to become one with the water. Just remember to surface for air once in a while.

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Steve Harvey can be reached by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A., 90012 and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.