High School Confusion Is a Classic

Dear Cynthia: I have been having this recurrent dream for 20 years: I am in a crowd of people as they are milling together in an outdoor courtyard. I feel confused, “Where am I?” Then I realize I’m back at high school! And I ask myself “Why am I back here?” I graduated in 1979. “What happened?” Before the question ever gets answered, the school bell rings signaling time to get to the next class. I panic because I realize I only have a few minutes to remember where my locker was. So I guess and pick one. Then I have to figure out the combination to the lock. Now, I am absolutely panicked. So in a rush I guess three numbers. In most of the dreams the locker will open. (Some dreams the locker doesn’t open, and I wake up.) Once the locker is open the next panic wave is “What class am I supposed to get to? Where is my schedule?”

I need to resolve what in the world this means so this dream will stop.

--ALMA

San Diego

Dear Alma: What you describe is a classic anxiety dream that most adults have experienced with some variations. The dream can occur when we feel as though we will be tested or judged and we feel nervous about the outcome. Before a job interview, when you are expecting house guests or any time you are concerned about measuring up to rules or expectations, you could experience this dream.

Are you someone who cares deeply about the opinions of others? Do you try hard to please? Maybe the dream will subside if you think a little more about pleasing yourself. You may need to learn to say, “That is good enough.” Instead of worrying that you could have done a little more, or a little better. Depending on your personality, you may desire more structure and organization in your life or less. If schedules make you nervous, then try to create a more relaxed approach, giving yourself plenty of time to get things done. If you desire more structure, create a schedule for yourself and post it on the refrigerator. Then reward yourself for sticking to it. And please let me know if you stop having the dream.

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Cynthia Richmond is the author of “Dream Power, How to Use Your Night Dreams to Change Your Life” (Simon & Schuster, 2000). Fax your dreams to Cynthia Richmond at (818) 783-3267 or e-mail them to in.your.dreams@worldnet.att.net. Please include your hometown and a daytime phone number. In Your Dreams appears every Tuesday and should be read for entertainment purposes only.