A Lesson in Giving a Driver Her Space

One of the most recent urban folk tales on the Web site of the San Fernando Valley Folklore Society (snopes. com) might be titled, “Driving Home a Point.” It concerns a gray-haired woman driving a Mercedes in a crowded mall parking lot. She patiently waits to take the spot of a departing shopper who is loading his car with packages.

But when the shopper pulls out, a young guy in a Corvette zooms up and takes the place from the other side. When the woman objects, the Corvette driver says, as he walks away, “Sorry, lady. That’s how it is when you’re young and quick.”

Whereupon the Mercedes driver floors it, crashing into the Corvette and crushing the back end. When the young man yelps, “You can’t do that,” the Mercedes driver responds, “That’s how it is when you’re old and rich.”

The Folklore Society could find no proof that the ever-circulating story happened. But one would like to think so.

WHICH REMINDS ME: I mention that tale to put you in the mood for today’s artwork, whose theme is “Temper, Temper” (see accompanying).

Things are getting so out of hand that Glenn Michel of Rancho Palos Verdes actually saw an offer of a “rage card.” (It was placed by a golf course but would probably be good on freeways too.) And Marla Doyle and Steven Morris found a shop that seemed to be marketing “ire.”

The truth, as we all know, is that rage is unhealthy on the highway (or the golf course). It can result in a visit to the “Family Collision Center,” snapped by Harry Salit of Pasadena. (Are there separate stalls for the cars of Dad, Mom, Junior and Sis?)

So, if the strain’s getting to you, take a vacation--to Malaysia, for instance, where you can relax at the low-key shop visited by Dave Moreno of Glendale.

FROM THE BIG APPLE TO THE BIG ORANGE: So why was a New York Post reporter knocking on doors on Chautauqua Boulevard in Pacific Palisades? Turns out that one home on that street was once the residence of Judith Nathan, the “good friend” of New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani, who has separated from his wife. The reporter was asking the neighbors what they remembered about Nathan.

Alas, all but one family on the block had arrived after Nathan moved away in the mid-1990s. Nobody stays put in Southern California.

CAR CULTURE BULLETINS: Some freeway billboards you wouldn’t find in Dubuque:

* “In this town, looks and money are everything (sports car ad).

* “Your commute should be this smooth (whiskey ad).

* “Own the 405 for the next 10 years” (car ad).

One wonders how many drivers look at that last blurb and wish they wouldn’t see the 405 for the next 10 years.

miscelLAny:

In his Great Moments in Courtroom History column in Forum magazine, San Diego lawyer Charles Sevilla recounts this exchange between a lawyer and a judge:

Lawyer: “Does the court have a preference as to where these videotapes should be?”

Judge: “Yes, but I don’t think it’s physically possible.”

*

Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, Times Mirror Square, L.A. 90053 and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.