You Know It’s Hollywood When a Toddler Is Too Old for the Role

Minus a nanny for the day, actress Rikki Dale took her 20-month-old daughter Joey to an audition for a computer commercial. When she realized the spot would show a mom cooing to her infant, she decided to audition her daughter as well.

But as they walked in, a staffer asked how old Joey was. “Twenty months,” her mother responded.

“Sorry,” the staffer said in fluent Hollywoodese, “she’s just not playing 18 months.”

And how did Joey react? “She said, ‘Momma, go to park,’ ” Dale reported. “Her mother should have such a good response to rejection.”

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LET’S SEE SOME I.D.: One of the court exchanges recounted in the Star News, an L.A. County sheriff’s publication:

Q. What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?

A. He said, “Where am I, Cathy?”

Q. And why did that upset you?

A. My name is Susan.

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BEARING UP: After seeing one of the “Welcome to California” signs on roadways around the state--apparently to greet people parachuting in--Bob Jeffers of Pacific Palisades commented, “Since when did the rat become the California state animal?” (See photo.)

I must admit I was unaware of the change. But I’m not sure it’s a rat. Any other opinions of what that creature is? Could be a wild bore. I mean, boar. I believe the latest census showed that California has no bores.

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SHE WAS FLOORED: These instructions on the label of her new doormat caught the eye of Linda Taubenreuther of Monrovia:

* Do not use mat as a projectile.

* When using mat, follow directions: Put your right foot in, put your right foot out, put your right foot in and shake it all about.

* This mat is not designed to sustain gross weight exceeding 12,000 pounds.

* Do not glue mat to porous surfaces, such as pregnant women, pets and heavy machinery.

And, lastly, the label warned about keeping the mat away from those “with CFED (compulsive fiber eating disorder).”

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A., 90012 and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.