Aboard Balboa Island Ferry, Big Spender Launches Couple’s Wedded Life

Roxie Felter of Newport Beach once told boyfriend J.T. Tarwater that if she ever got married again, it would be on the Balboa Island ferry because the trip “takes three minutes and costs 35 cents.”

Well, the other day, Felter and Tarwater did indeed exchange wedding vows as they crossed from the mainland to the island.

The ceremony, before family members who also hitched a ride, went smoothly on the calm waters. It was conducted by a minister; the ferry captain couldn’t marry them, Felter pointed out, “because we weren’t far enough out at sea.”

There was one minor complication. In the years since Felter made the vow about the ferry, the fare had risen to 50 cents.

The gallant Tarwater paid for her anyway--in both directions.

“It’s one dollar round trip,” she pointed out.

To live and drive in L.A.: Some items that spun out of control and into this column (see accompanying):

* An Oldsmobile that can’t cut it.

* A wayward Ford (submitted by Carole Weinman).

* A company willing to fill an opening for a driver with any old goof (submitted by Jim Moore).

* And a traffic warning suitable for any commuting day here, spotted on the Internet by Wayne Pitzler.

If the Blue Pill doesn’t do the job . . . : So enduring is the urban myth that green M & Ms are an aphrodisiac that the idea was shot down in the book “Rumor!” by Hal Morgan and Kerry Tucker.

While the Mars Co. says it didn’t start the rumor, it did go to court several years ago to block a Santa Monica company from calling its “sexy” candies the Green Ones.

And now Mars, possibly influenced by all the publicity over Viagra, has given the urban myth new vitality.

Perhaps you’ve seen the ad in the movie houses where a mother and father peek into the desk of their teenage son and find, to their horror, not X-rated magazines, but a drawer full of the green ones.

Penny unwise: You may recall that I recently published a debt notice of one cent ($0.01) that a puzzled Harold Hartman of L.A. received from Blue Shield. The bill listed medical services by a provider identified as “unknown”--and it was 12 years old.

So when Hartman notified Blue Shield, the company apologized for wasting his time, right? Not exactly. Blue Shield wrote back:

“In order to conclude our review of the questions raised, additional time will be needed. You will be notified of the results of the review as soon as it is completed.”

The pleasure was not hers, thank you: Ruth Fry of Camarillo took an American Airlines flight to the Midwest, only to discover that her luggage had taken a side trip to Stockholm. The airline agreed to pay for some clothing and necessities, and the luggage finally returned on the third day. But she was not charmed by a subsequent note from an airline rep saying that American was “sorry for the convenience.”

Observed Fry: “It was anything but ‘convenient’ to be without my luggage for three days.”

miscelLany: Under the heading “Reckless Driver,” the Seal Beach Sun’s police log reported: “Four females in a vehicle were doing doughnuts on the street. They said they were practicing for a driver’s test.”

Yup, sounds like they’re ready to add to the craziness of Southland roadways.

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012 and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.