LAUGH LINES
The Wedding Business: “So many people traveled to the tiny town in Scotland where Madonna got married that the mayor says they expected to make over $2 million in tourist revenues. In fact, the wedding [made] so much money for the town, they’ve asked Madonna to have her next several weddings there also.” (Conan O’Brien)
Plans in the Works: “President Clinton is still working out what he’s going to do when he leaves office. . . . Bill and Hillary have bought a house in Washington. As you know, they spent eight years trying to sell the White House.” (Daily Scoop)
Money Woes: “President Clinton has announced that the federal surplus for the 2001 fiscal year will be larger than anticipated by some $17 billion. . . . That should buy us a little more time before George W. Bush wrecks the economy.” (Ira Lawson)
Profitable Vows: “Madonna’s wedding reportedly cost $3 million. . . . Madonna’s movies don’t even make $3 million!” (Andrew Wisot)
Rising Costs: “The 1-cent postage stamp increase [has] many people complaining. They don’t seem to understand that it is very expensive for the post office to repair all those bullet holes!” (Morty Wright)
Got a joke? Send it to Laugh Lines by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Southern California Living, Los Angeles Times, 202 W. 1st St., Los Angeles, 90012.
Sign up for The Wild
We’ll help you find the best places to hike, bike and run, as well as the perfect silent spots for meditation and yoga.
You may occasionally receive promotional content from the Los Angeles Times.