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LAUGH LINES

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Watts Up: “Power is becoming a rare commodity in Southern California. To protect the driver, Edison trucks have signs that say, ‘Driver carries 20 watts or less.’ ” (Ray Martinez)

He’s Got the Blues: “President Clinton . . . [is] getting to be a little . . . melancholy. He’s leaving behind in the White House a lot of . . . memories--or as we call it: evidence!” (David Letterman)

Presidential Special: “The Presidential Inaugural Committee announced today that it is going to start selling Republican presidential souvenirs, including George W. Bush commemorative shot glasses, car travel mugs, key chains and license plates--everything you need to drive drunk just like [Bush] did.” (Jay Leno)

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Like Cats and Dogs: “The Clinton’s White House cat, Socks, and the family’s dog, Buddy, have not gotten along well during their tenure in Washington. They are natural enemies. They get along like . . . Bill and Hillary.” (Jerry Perisho)

Busy Bee: “Linda Chavez will not be our secretary of Labor. She has withdrawn the nomination. . . . She said that suddenly she found herself bogged down with an incredible amount of housework.” (Letterman)

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Got a joke? Send it to Laugh Lines by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Southern California Living, Los Angeles Times, 202 W. 1st St., Los Angeles, 90012.

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