Falling Asleep at the Joystick and Wisecrack Mania

By AARON CURTISS

May 3, 2001 12 AM PT

aaron.curtiss@latimes.com

Maybe it was just the big weekend breakfast, but the dominant feeling playing “Driving Emotion Type-S” for Sony PlayStation 2 was sleepiness. Despite a few nice tricks, “Type-S” offers racing fans little to get excited about.

The game’s conceit is that it’s designed for players who take their racing seriously and appreciate the sort of realistic physics that leave novices spinning out and slamming into walls.

Fair enough. Were I ever to get my wife’s Miata above 100 mph through downtown Santa Monica, I have no doubt that it would be as much of a skittish little deathtrap as the virtual Miata was in “Type-S.”

That’s why people play video games: to experience things that would be foolish to attempt in real life. Driving really fast in tight quarters with other speeding vehicles definitely fits into that category.

So, if nothing else, the game delivers a technically accurate experience. But frankly, what’s missing from “Driving Emotion Type-S” is “emotion.” The game feels like it was written not by people who love playing games but by people who love engineering traffic roundabouts.

Yes, the physics are quite nice. The PS2’s analog thumbsticks provide exquisitely tight control. Turns require a refined touch and it’s impossible to make it through a single course by merely slamming the wheel hard in one direction or the other. Finally, the PS2’s pressure-sensitive buttons give players incredible control not only over how much gas they give the car but also how fast they give it.

But a great game demands more than just technical prowess. It requires artistic virtuosity. Or enough bells and whistles to completely snow players. Sadly, “Type-S” delivers neither.

Cars are a predictable mix of Japanese and German--Hondas, Mazdas, BMWs and Porsches. Players get little say over how their cars are configured. Aside from swapping tires or paint colors, there’s almost no ability to customize.

The courses, which generally share top billing with cars in a racing title, are nothing special either. For starters, they’re too short. Not even the expert tracks--which are little more than a few curves tacked on to the beginner courses--are interesting enough to spend much time with.

And they’re dull to look at. The tracks cut through generic cities and countrysides that look like the backdrops for countless other racers. Most of us get plenty of dull scenery during our commute. We shouldn’t have to endure it in a video game.

“Driving Emotion Type-S” gives players precise control that takes practice to master. But there’s little incentive to invest the kind of time it takes to become really good when the rest of the game suffers.

‘The Simpsons Wrestling’

Purely as a wrestling game, “The Simpsons Wrestling” for Sony Play-Station is an average title in a crowded field. Some might argue that misses the point. This is, after all, a wrestling game featuring the funniest family on TV. It’s more than just a wrestling game, right?

Nope. Not really.

Sure, “The Simpsons Wrestling” stars Lisa, Bart, Homer, Marge and many other familiar faces from Springfield--all voiced by the actors who play them on television. And, of course, there are some funny lines that pop up here and there.

But none of this overcomes the fact that “The Simpsons Wrestling” is still a wrestling game that costs $40. For that kind of dough, most players want something that offers more long-term value than a couple of digitally looped wisecracks.

Players get to compete as any one of several characters from the animated series. More characters get unlocked as players win more rounds. Each has his or her own set of skills and attacks. Barney the drunk, for instance, belches up a foul cloud to knock out his opponents and Groundskeeper Willie hacks his foes with a rake. Marge wallops people with her hair.

You get the idea. And, probably, you get enough of the joke that you don’t have to buy the game. That’s because once you finish giggling at some of the silliness, there’s not much left to play.

The attacks are repetitive and the computer opponents never seem to wise up. Playing as Groundskeeper Willie, for instance, I was able to move swiftly through the game doing little more than smacking the digital foes over and over with garden implements.

For players who love “The Simpsons” and enjoy brawlers, “The Simpsons Wrestling” is worth a weekend rental. Play it for a few hours with a friend, laugh at some of the jokes and then return it Sunday night and watch the show.

Aaron Curtiss is editor of Tech Times.

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The Skinny

“Driving Emotion Type-S”

Genre: Racing

Price: $50

Platform: Sony PlayStation 2

Publisher: Squaresoft

ESRB rating*: Everyone

The good: Nice control

The bad: No soul

Bottom line: Pass