Swim Ware
I found the perfect bathing suit, and I didn’t even have to shave my legs.
Lacking the time--and energy--to thoroughly prep for the body baring that swimwear shopping entails--the tweezing and tanning and toning--I slipped on some sweats and painlessly purchased three suits online.
Needless to say, because of the homemade chocolate chip cookies I ate in the process, not all of them fit.
An initial Yahoo search for online swimwear vendors produced several unfashionable results. Most of the sites I came across featured florescent-color tank suits and leopard-print bikinis complete with matching sarongs.
Not my style.
Buying skimpy spandex suits without trying them on first is scary enough. You never know just how much they’ll cover. So I decided not to take my chances with unfamiliar sites, choosing instead to stick with online merchants whose names I already knew.
J.Crew’s Web site, at https://www.jcrew.com, includes a “swimfinder” feature that searches for suits to “flatter your not-so-perfect parts.” Select the body part you wish you hadn’t inherited--those short legs, thick thighs or broad shoulders--and it will recommend a style that is best for your frame.
My “not-so-perfect” part: my not-so-there chest.
According to the swimfinder, a triangle/string bikini would maximize my bust, and it offered more than a dozen styles from which to choose. After selecting a halter top, I entered a virtual changing room where I could try it on with a half-dozen different bottoms. A female torso modeled each combination.
Although I had already decided on the halter, once inside the changing room, I had to try on everything. With the mix-and-match feature, I could check out the other tops in the same collection, and I spent at least 10 minutes clicking back and forth between the options. Halter. Bandeau. Halter. Bandeau. Halter. Bandeau.
And so on.
After acknowledging that the bandeau would not hold up well while water skiing this summer, I finally decided on the halter top for $34 and a rugby-stripe bikini bottom for $30. Because each piece is purchased separately, those of us who are a little smaller on top can order different sizes to fit our proportions.
Total cost for the suit, including tax, shipping and handling: $77.60.
With that purchase made, I decided to look for something a little less practical. The Victoria’s Secret site features one of the most extensive--and expensive--selections of swimwear, including a green sequined bikini for $210. You can browse the site at https://www.victoriassecret.com by collection or search for suits with specific features: pads, no pads, wire, no wire, etc.
Unlike the J.Crew site, which displays most of its suits as silhouettes, Victoria’s Secret includes photographs from its swimwear catalog, challenging you to look as good in the skimpy suits as the models wearing them.
Bypassing the sequined suit, I headed straight for the “sexy bikini” category. What else would you buy from Victoria’s Secret? I found a funky tropical-print string bikini. Although it was a little pricey at $74, I decided to splurge.
Since the entire suit came in one order, I couldn’t purchase separate sizes for the two pieces, so I hoped that the discrepancies between my top and bottom wouldn’t be too obvious.
Total cost: $90.90.
Having spent more than enough money, I decided to check out Banana Republic’s sale items. Although the site, at https://www.bananarepublic.com, has a limited swimwear collection--containing only about a dozen suits, most part of a new denim collection--I found a black one-piece for nearly 50% off its original price. Unable to locate a sizing chart on the site, I guessed at my size, figuring I’d gotten a good deal at $35.63.
I received the J.Crew and Banana Republic suits in the mail after about a week. The Victoria’s Secret bikini took nearly two weeks to arrive. In the end, though, it was worth the extra wait.
While the scooped neckline accentuated the Banana Republic model’s cleavage, its low cut made mine disappear. The J.Crew two-piece fit much better, thanks to the different size top and bottom, but the halter top didn’t maximize my bust as much as I’d hoped. It was all right, but it wasn’t perfect.
The Victoria’s Secret suit, however, came pretty close. The string bikini top helped give the illusion that something was there, and the rainbow streaking across the bottom backside added appropriate attitude. It was a keeper.
Since both J.Crew and Banana Republic allow customers to return online purchases to their stores--Victoria’s Secret does not--I brought in the suits and had them credited to my account.
Now I’m shaving my legs.
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Christine Frey is a freelance writer.
