USC Football Seems to Be Quickly Hitting the Wall

USC Coach Pete Carroll sat at a table Tuesday for his weekly meeting with the media, the sign behind him and just above his head reading: “Wall of Champions.”

I’ve always found the folks at USC to be tremendously optimistic.

For example, people continue to think things will improve under the guidance of Athletic Director Mike Garrett, and to be honest, things are really looking up: One more football win and the Trojans will reach the .500 mark in victories and defeats (33-33) over the past six years.

HAD THE sign read “Wall of Records” behind Carroll--USC at 1-4 off to its worst start in football since 1958--it would’ve made a nice picture for the cover of this week’s GameDay program with the appealing headline: “Carroll’s Trojans Can Match School’s All-Time Worst Start of 1-5 in 1957 With One More Belly Flop.”

I tried listening to Carroll while he briefed the media, but I lack the wherewithal to translate gibberish, so my attention turned to the Wall of Champions, which was very revealing.

Reading from left to right it’s an admission USC is no longer a football school: water polo claiming a national championship in 1998, swimming in 1997, tennis in 1994, football in 1978, track and field in 1976, baseball in 1998, volleyball in 1990 and basketball in 1984--the women, of course.

Anyone doubling in track and field and football at USC is obviously a real loser.

How far have the Trojans slipped in football? Well, in this week’s Trojan press release under “Fun Fact,” we learn USC has been on ABC only once this year and the last time USC appeared on ABC as few as three times a year was in 1986.

I’ll bet Garrett had a lot of fun reading that fact.

ABC still has the option to pick up the Cal-USC game, a college stinker to rival next Monday night’s ABC pro fiasco between Washington and Dallas, but I think the chances of that happening are about as good as USC President Steven Sample agreeing to a sit-down interview with Dennis Miller.

TWO WEEKS ago on a beautiful Saturday afternoon, after a wonderful day of tailgating and watching the Trojans lose again, two longtime USC fans found themselves sitting contently in the Coliseum.

As Roger Smith--an editor here at The Times, a USC graduate, fan for 40 years and season ticket holder for the past 12 years--tells the story, his friend began to tell him what a great day it had been until he realized: “We’ve been Sampli-fied.”

Smith said he defines Sampli-fied USC rooters “as those who accept the new reality, which is that football will never be as important to the school as it once was.”

It’s Garrett’s task to ensure that happens, and you’d have to say he’s doing a good job.

Now the next step for a Sampli-fied USC, of course, is to adjust its schedule. It’s no fun, as Carroll has learned, playing Troy State to Nebraska every week.

That’s what makes the rest of this season so inviting to the Trojans, a chance to play other mediocre programs like their own, thereby giving them the chance to win. The six remaining opponents have a combined record of 12-13, and take away that UCLA football powerhouse across town, and the Trojans will be playing teams with a combined mark of 8-13.

There’s a real chance once again for a Sampli-fied USC to finish 5-6 or even 6-5. Who knows, Garrett might even get a bonus out of it for keeping football in proper perspective at a Sampli-fied USC.

IT’S STILL going to be tough for Carroll to deliver a mediocre season, although he comes to USC with the credentials--34-33 as a head coach in the NFL.

The problem is he already has made it known he has been given a bunch of players who aren’t very good, and this week the USC crumb-dumbs will be going up against Arizona State, which also has a new coach in Dirk Koetter.

The difference between Carroll and Koetter: “We really like our talent,” Koetter said.

However, he’s also high on USC. “There’s not another 1-4 team in the country that USC couldn’t beat the heck out of.” That’s got to make Garrett feel better.

Unfortunately, ASU appears to be way ahead of USC in following the Sampli-fied Plan, scheduling and beating the likes of San Diego State, San Jose State and Louisiana Lafayette this season, losing only a Pac-10 game to Stanford.

With a schedule like that going for USC, the Trojans would have a chance to be sitting .500 right now--even with their crumb-dumbs.

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USC QUARTERBACK Carson Palmer said, “We expect to go to a bowl game this year, and we can’t unless we win the rest of our games and get to 7-4. But to get to 7-4, Coach [Norm] Chow says we have to get to 2-4 first.”

You can’t say the coaches at USC don’t know what they’re talking about.

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AGENT LEIGH Steinberg told USA Today that quarterback Jeff George is looking for a “longtime deal.” I believe the deal is--he’s going to be an ex-football player for a long time.

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THE ST. PAUL Pioneer Press quoted former Viking CEO Roger Hedrick as saying he “isn’t sure Los Angeles is a favored site for the next NFL team relocation. I think Toronto and Mexico City are just as likely as Los Angeles.”

I see the NFL at work, trying to drum up leverage in winning new stadium deals in Minnesota, New Orleans, Indianapolis and San Diego, while putting pressure on L.A. to act more interested in getting a team. It won’t work.

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THE NFL intends to scale back on events leading to the Super Bowl. I’d begin by canceling the NHL All-Star Game the day before the Super Bowl.

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TODAY’S LAST word comes in an e-mail from No Icing:

“Please don’t show your ugly mug at Staples Center during the hockey season.”

I want you to know that mug was a Father’s Day gift from my daughter, and I think it’s beautiful.

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T.J. Simers can be reached at t.j.simers@latimes.com