Here’s the Big Perspective on Little League Scandal

I worry we’re sending the wrong message to parents.

We were right on the verge of a major breakthrough, too, maybe one more 14-year-old righthander away from smoking Japan in the Little League World Series, and now we have all this handwringing, which is only going to make our kids losers.

Sports columnists everywhere have spent the past few days telling us how to raise our children, and frankly, I’m surprised some of you have done as well as you have without their help until now.

“Parents Should Allow Kids Just To Be Kids,” read the headline across Joe Henderson’s hard-hitting column in the Tampa Tribune. In the Washington Post, Sally Jenkins wrote that Little League should be abolished, and “if adults want to be more involved in their children’s lives, they should teach them to be quiet in restaurants.” I suspect Sally doesn’t have any kids.

Some columnists expressed outrage because kids were left crying after the final game. That wouldn’t have happened had a 14-year-old been playing third base instead of an error-prone 12-year-old.

Now you know sooner or later someone is going to write: “Kids Should Just Have Fun,” and if people start to buy that kind of nonsense we might as well pack up the gear and not even bother to make the trip to Williamsport. You think ABC-TV brings everyone together in Williamsport for fun?

If this kind of thinking creeps into the minds of our little ones: “All you can do is try your best,” then the USA trying to win the Little League World Series is going to be like the Angels trying to win the pennant.

It’s bad enough we have our kids seeing Phil Mickelson playing catch in the parking lot with a big smile on his face before going belly up in another major. I know a few Little League coaches, if given the chance to get into Mickelson’s face, could get more out of him.

Mickelson probably played right field as a kid.

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THIS WHOLE mess, of course, is the media’s fault, or we might still have a chance next year to win the Little League World Series. The columnists like to tell parents to back away from their children when it comes to youth sports, and then they go Woodward and Bernstein into the hall of records to check on the kids as if they are trying to undermine the USA’s commitment to rule the world in Little League baseball. What is it with these people?

Newspapers should spend more time accentuating the positive. Where’s the appreciation for American ingenuity at work? It’s like that scene in the “Untouchables,” when Sean Connery tells Kevin Costner, “You wanna get Capone? Here’s how you get him. He pulls a knife, you pull a gun ... “

If you wanna beat the International kids, they play really good 12-year-olds, we play a 14-year-old.

Better yet, we import our 14-year-old from a country that is well-known for producing good players and make him one of our own just in time for the World Series, keep him out of school and allow him to sharpen his baseball skills. As most kids-and some Little League fathers-will tell you, nothing gets in the way of good 70 mph slider like math and spelling homework.

If anything, America’s Olympic gymnasts and figure skaters have taught us the value of sacrificing their childhood. This is a chance to meet the president and get a hero’s greeting from the mayor of New York. Look at your own child-the next time someone calls their name it’ll probably be the cops.

The Yankees were watching Danny, and his team was known as the “Bronx Baby Bombers.” A signed baseball by the kid sold for more than $400 on eBay.

We’re talking role model here. This could inspire some other 14-year-old to step forward and help our country win the World Series.

You put all this on film with Jack Nicholson playing the role of crusty tutor to the kid while he’s working on his fastball, knowing one slip up and the team from Japan is going to pounce on it, and parents and kids are lined up around the block waiting to see the movie: “Danny Boy.” Maybe we have a waiting list of 14-year-olds, willing to shave three times a day if necessary to successfully disguise themselves as 12-year-olds.

More revelations from the media, however, have once again ruined the legend of Danny Boy. Instead of dreaming of playing hooky, developing a curve and being carried off the field on the shoulder of their teammates, our kids have learned Danny Boy was going to school in the Dominican Republic. Instead of being the Natural, he was just a seventh grader.

I’m afraid for the next few years both parents and kids are going to go straight because of this media push to be politically correct.

I know it’s absolutely the worst thing you can say in sports, but we’ll probably start sending kids to Williamsport who “are just happy to be there.”

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NOW YOU’VE heard people say they would do almost anything for $1 million. Would you take a check for $11.25 million in exchange for spending the rest of your life known as the NFL’s all-time bust? Ryan Leaf did.

I PLAYED golf with sports editor Bill Dwyre. He swung and missed the ball with a three-wood. Wasn’t even close. On a more successful note, I can report he hit the ball at least 100 times.

THE CLIPPERS no longer play in the Sports Arena, the Raiders no longer call the Coliseum home, but last year there were 235-240 events in the two facilities, generating more than $2 million in profit.

WHEN IT comes to Mike Garrett’s stubborn streak, I’ll bet Al Martin gets an invitation to a reunion of USC football players before John Robinson.

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THIS INTERESTING stat comes from a weekend radio show on XTRA: USC is the only Pac-10 school not to finish in the final top 10 AP poll since 1990.

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TODAY’S LAST word comes in an e-mail from Sam:

“Any chance the Coliseum Commission will put John McKay’s plaque where the players can see it when they come into the stadium?”

I’m not sure the Coliseum Commission knows where the stadium is.

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T.J. Simers can be reached at t.j.simers@latimes.com.