Calling Teams Names Can Hurt You
With hog-calling and pigs’ feet-eating contests between innings, the minor league Fort Worth Cats recently staged “You Might Be a Redneck Night.”
The ballpark promotion seemingly was a hit with everyone except the Cats’ opponent, the Jackson (Miss.) Senators, who became offended when the public-address announcer informed the crowd that it’s a good clue you’re a redneck if you:
“Manage the Jackson Senators; Play for the Jackson Senators; Live in Jackson, Miss.; All of the above.”
With the sound of cowbells saluting them as they stepped into the batter’s box, the irate Senators promptly scored six runs in the first three innings.
Unfazed, the Cats’ promotions department has plans for a “Labor Stoppage Night” in the event of a major league players’ strike. Pregnant fans will be admitted free.
Trivia time: Who hit .400 in World Series play a record three times?
Shoe wars: LeBron James, who some NBA scouts say could become the greatest basketball player since Michael Jordan, has triggered fierce competition between shoe companies trying to sign the 17-year-old Ohio prep star to an endorsement contract.
The winner of the James sweepstakes will be “whoever comes to the table with the best offer,” James told the Bloomberg News Service. He chuckled when asked if $5 million would be inducement enough. “I hear that number, and it makes me smile,” he said.
Foul forecast: From Bud Geracie of the San Jose Mercury News: “San Jose State’s football team was picked to finish eighth in the Western Athletic Conference, but that’s not so bad. Last season’s champ, Louisiana Tech, was picked to finish ninth.”
Don’t bet on it: A spokesman for the Phoenix Coyotes denied a report in the Chicago Tribune stating that Wayne Gretzky, 41, a minority owner with the Coyotes, has been preparing for a possible return to the NHL as a player.
“Wayne’s been skating and playing pickup games this summer, but that’s just to help him stay and shape and feel better,” Rich Nairn told the Bloomberg News Service.
A return to playing could be risky for Gretzky, who has two herniated disks in his neck.
Simple plan: Sean Keeler of the Des Moines (Iowa) Register suggests two ways the Big Ten Conference can improve its football profile:
“1. Have your teams schedule at least one traditional leader or contender from a power conference. 2. Beat them.
“There. Was that so hard?”
Trivia answer: Eddie Collins, in 1910 and 1913 with the Philadelphia Athletics and in 1917 with the Chicago White Sox.
And finally: Television commentator Lee Corso, as usual, didn’t hold back when he addressed the problems facing the Southeastern Conference at a college football kickoff luncheon in Atlanta. Two SEC schools, Alabama and Kentucky, are on probation and three others, Tennessee, Louisiana State and Mississippi State, are being investigated for possible violations.
“The national view is, the SEC cheats,” Corso said. “Everybody’s a bunch of cheaters, a bunch of crooks. The SEC’s got a public relations problem. They better show they’ve got more than that.”