Sentimental shopper

I was raised on a strict regimen of holiday cheer -- elaborate tree-trimming sessions sweetened with mulled wine, figgy pudding and heavy rotations of Handel’s “Messiah.”

But the mid-20s have proved a rough era for this holiday junkie, and I’ll stop at nothing to rekindle those childhood memories. Which is why every year around this time, I make a pilgrimage to the malls of our fine city and throw myself headlong into an ice blended froth of yuletide commerce.

You can keep your online shopping and your electronic wish lists. Give me crowded elevators, red tag sales and vast Escher-esque parking structures. Christmas is a time to hit the streets, not to sit in bed with your laptop. Our car culture is a big enough impediment to social interaction. Besides, the three-tiered flow of foot traffic in the Beverly Center is the closest thing to a Fifth Avenue street scene you’re going to get.

But the mall is more than just a place to charge and be charged. It vigilantly tends the Christmas flame, placing ornate decorations around every corner and erecting tannenbaums in strategic locations. Windows are dressed to the nines in reds, whites and greens, while modern-day variations on classic carols spin inside CD players. If you find yourself running low, chances are a lengthy trip to the mall will imbue you with enough Christmas to propel you through New Year’s and into Twelfth Night.

Then again, I am a bit biased. I grew up in these malls. Before Brand Boulevard got its retail make-over, trips to Glendale in early December meant three things: a hot dog on a stick, an Orange Julius and a trunk full of Galleria shopping bags, many of which contained presents that belonged to me.

Love it or hate it, malling was the most efficient way to shop, and it still is.

Awkward, preemptive phone interrogations to help take the guesswork out of gift giving will be a thing of the past once you begin taking group field trips to shopping centers. One-click Web jockeys take note, for there is no better way to satisfy the urge for instant gratification than this. While you’re busy sucking down a peppermint latte on Level 1, a significant other is on Level 3 buying those leather gloves you were coveting not 15 minutes earlier.

Still, most look down their noses at this activity, ranting about long lines, traffic and everyone’s favorite scapegoat: the people. The high concentration of bodies in one building can crack the will of the most experienced shopper. So why not use it to your advantage?

Precious vacation time is eaten up attending catch-up parties thrown by people who feel compelled to sneak in a little year-end face time after effectively blowing you off for the last 325 days. These gatherings are usually uncomfortable and hardly festive. Instead, visit them at the Sherman Oaks Galleria or Century City’s expansive outdoor bazaar.

They will be there, merchandise in hand. And you’ll be ready. Calm, collected and brimming with merriment; armed with just enough anecdotes to fuel a five-minute “how ya been” before disappearing into Rizzoli for a periodical. The mall codifies the smells and sights of the season, with a few familiar faces thrown in for good measure.

Just remember the one cardinal rule: No matter what the cost, always valet-park.

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Malls on Santa’s list

Beverly Center: 8500 Beverly Blvd., Los Angeles. (310) 854-0070.

Glendale Galleria: 2148 Glendale Galleria, Glendale. (818) 240-9481.

Sherman Oaks Galleria: 15301 Ventura Blvd., Sherman Oaks. (818) 382-4100.

Westfield Shopping Town Century City (formerly Century City Shopping Center): 10250 Santa Monica Blvd., Los Angeles. (310) 277-3898.