A Different Kind of Dog Dropping Has Owner Barking to Cops
The crime blotter of the L.A. Independent carried a complaint from a woman whose large dog “stays out on the balcony of her apartment when she is not home. The dog has pillows and blankets out there, which it occasionally throws over the balcony.”
The dog owner claims that when the items land below, her downstairs neighbor “throws them in the trash.”
I don’t suppose it would help to teach the mutt to fetch.
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Food for thought: When Joel Davis spotted a store sign in Atwater Village, he concluded: “They must use a special kind of ‘flower’ in their pastries” (see photo).
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Speaking of unusual combinations: Joyce Thorne of San Diego spotted a place where you could evidently get your teeth cleaned without leaving your car (see accompanying).
Thorne believes the ad was supposed to say “car wash and detail center.”
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Turning to crime: As she filled out a mail order form for some magazines, Gail Fisher of Whittier realized she didn’t have the prison currency necessary--though she added: “I do have a personal check” (see accompanying).
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A landlord who lays down the law: Gloria West of Calabasas noticed a rental in a drug-free house (see accompanying).
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Presidents in training: When Pasadena teacher Valerie Anne Williams assigned her third-graders an essay titled “If I Were President for a Day,” the kids at San Rafael Elementary School came up with some interesting parallels to the real-life occupants of the White House.
Eliud Celis, for instance, would have a dining routine reminiscent of ex-President Clinton’s. When he becomes president, he said, “I will go to McDonald’s with my wife and get a Big Mac.” (OK, the parallel isn’t perfect--I don’t recall Hillary Rodham Clinton accompanying her hubbie to the golden arches.)
Salvador Vega brought back memories of Warren G. Harding’s favorite sport: “In the evening I will go home and invite my friends for dinner and after dinner we will play poker with cards and poker chips.”
But none of the students spoke of eating pretzels as president, obviously having learned from George W.’s problem with the twisty things. Martha Monroy did say, however, she would “go to the movies and eat a lot of popcorn.”
As far as letting off steam is concerned, Latasha Jones didn’t mention golf or jogging. She said that at the end of her work day in the Oval Office, “I will go outside and howl.” I guess working with Congress will do that to you.
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miscelLAny: In its February issue, California Lawyer reprinted this excerpt from a jury questionnaire for a death penalty case in Riverside:
Q: What do you consider the most important thing you can teach your children?
A: To swim.
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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A., 90012 and by e-mail at steve .harvey@latimes.com.