Auditioning for That Writing Credit

The highlight of “Hollywood Pitch Market: A Screenwriters Conference” is a pitch-a-thon where writers get five minutes to present ideas to movie executives before moving to the next table. The weekend event earlier this month at the DoubleTree Hotel in Westwood drew more than 200 unknown writers from Hollywood and beyond. We asked a few talents to give us their best shot.

David Kluger, 21, student/bartender, Austin, Texas

Pitch us your script in 30 words or less.

“Drinking Windex”--A janitor is blamed for stealing payoff money that was supposed to go to a hit man.

Your writing background?

I was the editor-in-chief of my high school newspaper, “The Pony Express.”

Why are screenwriters so low on the Hollywood totem pole?

It’s a business.

What blockbuster film do you hate?

“Titanic.” The acting was too campy.

Favorite movie line?

The entire film “Kicking and Screaming” is hilarious.

Patrick Coker 31, writer/actor, Los Angeles

Pitch us your script in 30 words or less.

“Burnout”: A young, wild female police officer in New York City is drafted by the FBI to infiltrate the city’s motorcycle culture to find out who’s financing deadly, illegal street races.

Your writing background?

I wrote for the college newspaper.

Why are screenwriters so low on the Hollywood totem pole?

Because original ideas are low on the Hollywood totem pole.

What blockbuster film do you hate?

“Rocky V.” The only reason for that was money.

Favorite movie line?

[From] “Rocky”: When he yelled, “Adrian!” it captured what was important with the whole movie.

Julie Cannon 28, writer, Toronto, Canada

Pitch us your script in 30 words or less.

“The Detail”: The first civilian woman in the Secret Service.

What’s your background as a writer?

I’ve written a sitcom for a dotcom. I got my first job in film because I knew how to use Final Draft software.

Why are screenwriters so low on the Hollywood totem pole?

Rarely do people see how much passion goes into the words.

Biggest nightmare Hollywood experience?

I once delivered a script to a very well-known actor. He was wearing a towel. He dropped the towel. He hit on me.

What blockbuster film do you hate?

“Godzilla.” It was a marketing campaign to manipulate the public. The tag line was “Size Does Matter.”

Favorite movie line?

In “Beautiful Girls,” Michael Rapaport says, “If she can cut her own food, she’s fair game.”

Heidi Morrell 34, writer/actress, Los Angeles

Pitch us your script in 30

words or less.

“Crazy Mouth.” Who do you trust most--your husband or your family? It’s a thriller.

Your writing background?

I’ve had poetry published and I was editor of the Scriptwriters Network Newsletter.

Why are screenwriters so low on the Hollywood totem pole?

They’re afraid of us because we know so much.

Biggest nightmare Hollywood experience?

I followed a manager from one agency to another and I never should have listened to her.

What blockbuster film do you hate?

“Face/Off,” with John Travolta and Nicolas Cage. It was an ego fest because of the trappings of celebrity.

Favorite movie line?

[From] “Shrek”: “You dense, irritating, miniature beast of burden.” It’s the pinnacle of frustration that any writer would know.