Southland Trafficmeister Tells Tale of Snake Couple’s Onramp Shenanigans

Isn’t there already enough hissing among commuters on the freeways? KNX radio trafficmeister Jim Thornton reported that a pair of rattlesnakes were spotted Friday morning on an onramp of the San Bernardino Freeway in Yucaipa.

“I guess they were sunning themselves,” Thornton said, “or doing whatever reptiles do on onramps.”

Skating through life: Chatting about other unusual sights on the freeways, Thornton told me about the time a truck had overturned on the Riverside Freeway in Anaheim Hills, bringing everything to a halt.

A motorist who was caught in the SigAlert behind the truck apparently didn’t have much farther to go to reach his destination. But he had to get there in a hurry. So, he just pulled over to the shoulder of the freeway, parked his car, pulled a skateboard out of his trunk, and rode away, briefcase in hand.

After hearing that Thornton had mentioned the incident that day, the skater/driver phoned and gave a simple explanation for temporarily ditching his car. “He said he knew he wasn’t going anywhere for a couple of hours,” Thornton recalled.

Moving on to X-rated freeway fare ... : Claudia Penny Dufau of Corona was on the Riverside Freeway when she passed a large tour bus bound for Las Vegas.

“I glanced up, and lo and behold, there--on not one, but two, three, four different screens in the bus--was a video of a couple in the altogether doing something altogether inappropriate for a GP freeway audience,” she said.

“I thought to myself, ‘Who are these people?’ Of course, I was referring to the passengers on the bus, not the pair on the screen.”

She passed the bus, but several minutes later the bus caught up and passed her. She noticed that a tamer movie was playing. Perhaps, she figured, the driver had speeded up because his eyes were back on the road.

Speaking of sex ... : A South Pasadena theater marquee with a surprising announcement caught the eye of Bingham Cherrie (see photo).

Hair-raising drama: Some unusual 911 calls to the L.A. County Sheriff’s Department, as recorded in the department publication “Star News”:

* Caller “has a strange hairdo and mother won’t let her in the house.”

* Caller told deputies he wanted “microchips from vocal larynx box and head removed.”

* Male was reported “directing traffic inside [Starbucks] store” even though “that store is not a drive-thru.”

* Woman complained “her relatives came for a visit and now are refusing to leave.”

* Customer reported “stamp machine in post office is broken and giving unlimited books of stamps.” And the customer was complaining?

Escape from Southern California: On a visit to the Australian island of Tasmania, Lance and Becky Larsen of Irvine saw evidence that koalas can be potty-trained (see photo).

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miscelLAny: For you weekend gardeners, Alex Morrison of L.A. saw an ad from a specialist who vows to keep your lawn brown (see accompanying). I guess I discovered that formula years ago.

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, ext. 77083; by fax at (213) 237-4712; by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012; and by e-mail at steve. harvey@latimes.com.